17 Signs You’re Turning Into Your Mother

Remember joking with your sibling(s) about all the quirky things your mom would do that embarrassed you? Now you catch yourself doing the same things you were so mortified by. It’s funny how the older you get, the more you resemble the woman who raised you. Here are 17 signs you’re not just your mother’s daughter — you’re actually turning into her.

  1. Anything and everything can be returned. You scoff at 30-day return policies because you know they were meant to be broken, and you return your strawberries to the grocery store if they weren’t sweet enough. They did cost $2.99, after all.
  2. You love shopping at Costco. Mainly because Costco will return anything and everything, but also because it makes perfect sense to buy 100 rolls of paper towels at a time for your one-person home. Oh, and you can stop for a hot dog on the way out. Fun!
  3. Arguing with customer service is like your day job. When they refuse to return the sweater you’ve obviously worn a time or two, you become irate and utter your most favorite words: “Let me speak to your manager.” Sure, people might call you a Karen, but the customer is always right!
  4. You never miss a sale. You surely don’t need 20 gray T-shirts, but how can you refuse anything the GAP marks down to $4.99? You’ve been known to set an alarm in your phone for an upcoming sale so you don’t miss out on the good stuff.
  5. You constantly worry. You stay up all night worrying about other people’s problems because you make everyone else’s problems your own. If this isn’t a sign you’re turning into your mother, we’re not sure what is.
  6. Friends and family are subject to your unsolicited advice. You’ve been spending way too much time watching Dr. Oz and now feel the need to share what he has taught you with everyone you know. Your friends probably would have no idea that sugar is bad for you if you didn’t text them about it every day!
  7. Critiquing other people’s manners is standard. Telling everyone you know how rude so-and-so is for not sending you a thank you note because you are the new self-appointed manners police, is par for the course – and gossiping about people behind their back isn’t rude at all.
  8. You love complaining about men. They are the absolute worst! Seriously, can’t live with them, can’t live without them. What a pain!
  9. You’ve misused more than a few text acronyms. LOL means laughing out loud? Who knew! All this time you thought it meant lots of love…
  10. Your dog is more important than your family. Because the dog doesn’t talk back, duh. He doesn’t give you any grief and he certainly doesn’t leave his dirty socks in front of the hamper instead of putting them in!
  11. Repurposing trash is your new hobby. Nothing is garbage anymore because you can find a new use for just about anything. Everyone should have 1,000 old butter or Cool Whip containers laying around so you can send your friends home with leftovers whenever they come over for dinner.
  12. You’ve adopted a “my house, my rules” attitude. You must have heard your mom say this a million times growing up, but now you find yourself saying it whenever you have unruly house guests. You aren’t a maid and the kitchen is closed when you’re done washing that last dish.
  13. Your shows are on, so everyone had better be quiet. Thank god for DVR because you aren’t missing General Hospital for anything. Oh, and the rage that ensues when there is a news break you don’t deem newsworthy enough…
  14. Running to the store in your pajamas isn’t a big deal. Once you have those pajamas on, why bother changing back into your clothes just because you need to stop at the store for some flour? Your mother always told you to look your best when you leave the house, but of course, the grocery store doesn’t count.
  15. “I’m fine” is a large part of your vocabulary. Saying you’re fine when you clearly are not fine and getting angry when people don’t realize that you are in fact not fine. Sure, this is a general compartmentalization technique used by lots of women, but you know you’re turning into your mother when you do this more and more often…
  16. You have selective memory. You can never remember to call your grandparents back, but you remember every wrong anyone has ever done to you and you will make sure they never forget it either.
  17. You use guilt trips to get your way. You know there is nothing that cannot be attained through guilt, and you’re the master.
Rachael is an award winning stand-up comedienne, freelance writer, and BravoTV superfan. Her Real Housewives tagline is “The only thing bigger than my boobs are my personalities.” In her spare time, she keeps busy catering to the needs of a very spoiled Siberian Husky, (Paris Hilton), cleaning the skeletons out of her closet (to make room for more shoes), and swiping left to everyone on Tinder. Follow her on twitter @therealplandd.