Your 30s Shouldn’t Be About Finding A Husband—Here’s What They’re Really For

You might think your 30s are when things take a serious turn: you find your soulmate, settle down, and have kids. That’s fine and well, but it’s not the only things your 30s are about. There’s so much great stuff happening! Here are 13 things your 30s should also be about because they’re important AF.

  1. Exploring yourself. Your personality has settled (thank goodness those 20-something insecurities and mood swings are over!) so you have a load of exploring to do. Go on a journey of self-exploration and see what you’re about. Fall in love with yourself!
  2. Discovering the fun of long-term relationships. Long-term relationships might be what you’re after in your 30s, but they don’t mean you have to get hitched ASAP. Now’s the time to have fun experiencing them and enjoying various relationship milestones that might be new for you, such as moving in with someone or buying a pet together, instead of rushing through them.
  3. Doing more than merely accepting your body. Body acceptance is good, but you should be feeling more than mere acceptance for the wonder that is your body. Love it! Enjoy it! Spoil it! See how stupid worries over stretch marks, cellulite, wrinkles, and a few extra pounds used to be. You’re free of all that crap.
  4. Enjoying your sexual life. They say a woman hits her sexual peak around her mid-thirties. Yee-haw! Research from the University of Texas has found that women in their 30s and early 40s are more sexual than women who are younger or older. They have more sexual fantasies and actual sex. The best part? You’re more confident about your body, which is sure to make for steamy sessions in the bedroom.
  5. Taking time to travel.  You’ve worked bloody hard to get your career off the ground, but now you can take some time off to travel. And you deserve it—in your 30s, women tend to experience a boost in their salaries, especially when they hit the age of 39. Now that’s something to look forward to!
  6. Buying yourself a home. You’re sick of renting and want to own property. Now’s the time to do it, especially if you’re earning more than you used to. You really don’t need a man to make the dream of having a beautiful home with a white picket fence happen.
  7. Building better relationships with your parents. When you get older, you start to understand your parents a little more, which can help you strengthen the relationships you have with them. This is especially important because while you’re aging, they are too and might need someone to help them a bit more.
  8. Not giving a damn what people think. You’re older, stronger, and more amazing. So why should you give other people’s opinions so much weight? Your opinion matters more when you settle into your 30s. And it’s awesome because it means you don’t let anyone bring you down.
  9. Chasing your dream. If you have a dream that’s been put on the back burner for a while, now’s the time to fan its flames. According to research that analyzed scientific innovators and winners of the Nobel Prize, people are more likely to experience their biggest creative breakthroughs in their late 30s. Start writing that novel you’ve always wanted to right now!
  10. Not letting dating determine your direction. By the time you hit 30, chances are you’ve been in unhappy relationships and you know that being alone is a hundred times better than being with someone who brings you down. Even if want to date in your 30s, you know that it’s not something you have to do and neither is finding your soul mate.
  11. Not wasting your time. As you get older, you start valuing your time more. This tends to happen especially when it comes to dating. Why waste time on the wrong guy, right? If you decide to date in your 30s, you’ll be better equipped to do it. You know your worth, which means you can GTFO of a relationship the second a guy shows his nasty red flags.
  12. Enjoying not having it all figured out. You really shouldn’t see your 30s as a time to have everything sorted out and being seriously adult. That’s seriously boring. You’ve gained enough wisdom along the way to see that life’s going to surprise you sometimes and take you in a totally different direction from what you had planned, but that it can be fun not to take yourself so seriously.
  13. Having a blast as a single woman. Being single at this point in your life can be a much better experience than when you were younger. You know yourself better, you’re more comfortable on your own, and you can take care of yourself, whether financially or emotionally. You create your own happiness, so you don’t need the relationship you thought was going to be so important in your 30s. If you consider that Americans tend to spend more of their lives single than married, it’s worth getting this lesson under your belt—and living it up as much as you can while you still have it.


Giulia Simolo is a writer from Johannesburg, South Africa with a degree in English Language and Literature. She has been working as a journalist for more than a decade, writing for sites including AskMen, Native Interiors, and Live Eco. You can find out more about her on Facebook and LinkedIn, or follow her on Twitter @GiuliaSimolo.