The Struggles Of Being A Woman Who’s Terrible At Hiding Her Feelings

The Struggles Of Being A Woman Who’s Terrible At Hiding Her Feelings ©iStock/Petar Chernaev

You’re strong, smart and killing it in life in every way. The one problem? You’re terrible at hiding your feelings. This isn’t necessarily a bad thing in general, but it definitely its fair share of trouble every once in a while. If you struggle to tamp down your emotions, you probably do the following:

  1. You overshare. Because you’ve always believed that honesty is the best policy, even when it comes to dating, there’s that tendency for you to reveal TMI (read: how many guys dumped you in the past, how you’ve had no luck in your recent dates, etc.) which sends guys running away before they even start getting close.
  2. You spill everything, including your deepest secrets. You always believe the best in everyone, which leads you to give your trust out way too easily to anyone who seems to take an interest in your life. You know they don’t need to know about the skeletons in your close, but you hope that by sharing these things, you’ll be better understood. Unfortunately, it doesn’t work that way.
  3. You end up saying inappropriate things out of “concern.” Even if you’re not asked for your opinion, sometimes you can’t help but share it because you’re concerned for others’ well-being (or at least that’s what you tell yourself). Of course, this often comes off as being overly critical, insensitive and judgmental when in fact, you’re just being your honest self.
  4. You’re not afraid to ugly cry in public. You couldn’t care less even if people see you unable to hold back the waterworks. You’ll cry, pour out your heart, scream your lungs out and cause a scene without meaning to (or without caring) because life’s too short to bottle up your feelings.
  5. You don’t know the meaning of “poker face.” This is a good thing generally since you don’t keep anyone guessing about what’s on your mind, but it does cause a problem when you’re trying to maintain some level of mystery. You try to bite your tongue and put on a poker face, but it’s all but impossible to pull off — people see right through you.
  6. You sometimes come across as a nagger. Because you’ve made it a point to say whatever’s on your mind and in your heart, people tend to find your “suggestions” more as nagging. This is definitely an issue in romantic relationships, because you just can’t keep quiet about the things that annoy you about him or your thoughts on his work situation or a fight he got in with his best bro.
  7. You find it impossible to give the silent treatment. You’ve had a fight with your S.O and you want to somehow punish him. Instead of giving him a taste of your silent treatment, you’ve decided to force him to hear you out. Nobody’s stopping you from letting your voice be heard because it’s your right. If he ever wants to leave, he’s free to do so. Never mind that he prefers to cool down before talking stuff out — you’ve got to get it out NOW.
Maine Belonio is a twenty-something mom and writer who has a penchant for coffee, long distance running, Tolkien, Switchfoot, and Jesus. Find her broken, honest, and brave musings at mainebelonio.com.
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