For all the talk about body positivity, most of us still have biases. I had one against being with overweight men, but then I met this great guy through a mutual friend. I wasn’t into him at first, but he had a great personality and it totally won me over. We ended up sleeping together and it was an amazing experience.
- Overweight guys have all the same parts. It sounds dumb, but I feel the need to lead with this. So often, we look at people with different body types than our own like they’re a different species. I just wanted to point out that overweight guys have all the necessary parts. Sex with them can be just as enjoyable or disappointing as with a super fit guy.
- He was great about grooming. Overweight guys do tend to sweat a lot more than your average fit guy, but the upside to this is that they’re great about grooming. The guy I slept with smelled divine, and I was pleased to find that he took care of himself from head to toe. Some guys think that just because they have six-pack abs, that’s all they have to do. Overweight guys, at least the ones that are confident, groom almost as much as we ladies do. It’s awesome!
- He was a lot more thoughtful. Having sex with someone is a vulnerable thing. Some guys want to get straight to the main course and don’t have much patience, but overweight guys have dealt with body insecurities and they understand the vulnerability involved in getting naked with someone. This guy took the time to make sure I was OK and comfortable. I love that! I’m so over guys trying to rip my clothes off without a care for whether I feel confident or not. Oh, and the body compliments he gave me were a bonus too.
- He liked to have comfortable sex. This is a biggie for me. Sometimes super fit guys want to focus on showing their prowess. Sorry guys, but folding me into a hundred different positions isn’t going to make up for your lack of technique. Overweight guys can have limited physical movement depending on their size, but that’s a positive because we can focus on having comfortable sex. That was totally the case with this guy and it was so refreshing.
- He took his time. Again, this is probably due to a fitness thing, but I don’t care. I’m tired of guys who are only interested in fast and furious sex. Most overweight guys don’t have that kind of stamina. I got to enjoy slow, intimate sex with him. You can call me vanilla, but that’s precisely what I like. It doesn’t matter whether it’s a one-night stand or a year-long relationship—true intimacy is my thing.
- He was way more emotionally present. Unfortunately, a lot of overweight guys have been bullied. Some of them shut down, but the ones that get up and move on tend to do so with higher emotional intelligence. I love that. When I slept with him, there was plenty of talking before, during, and after sex. I felt so taken care of. It’s funny to think that a little bit of talking made me feel more protected than having a muscular arm wrapped around me. Emotional intimacy is more important than physical intimacy.
- He went the extra mile. Again, this is a compensation thing, I assume. A lot of overweight guys can’t outdo themselves in the stamina department, so they focus on other things, i.e., foreplay. You don’t need me to tell you how great that was to experience! Let’s just say you probably won’t have to convince an overweight guy to go down on you.
- He was great to cuddle up to. I’m the type of girl that loves a good cuddle after sex. Overweight guys are like big teddy bears and their dad bods are perfect for cuddling. They’re soft, warm, and they smell great. Laying your head on a set of rock-hard pecs isn’t all that comfortable. It may look sexy, but it doesn’t feel all that great. I’ll take a soft chest any day, and that’s exactly what I got with this guy.
- He actually told me he wanted a relationship—and now we’re in one! A lot of men have massive egos, but not the case for overweight guys (at least in my experience). It probably stems from the fact that not a lot of women want to be in relationships with them, or so they think. Well, I’m happy to say that I’m now in a relationship with an overweight man and I couldn’t be happier! Everything isn’t perfect, but I find that there are quite a few distinct positives that I want to stick around for. So, the next time a cute, overweight guy asks you out, don’t think about what your friends would say if they saw you together. Overweight guys make great boyfriends—and yes, the sex will be just as good, if not better.
