I Don’t Miss You, I Miss Being In A Relationship

We broke up, boo hoo. Breakups happen every day and I’m so over ours. I’ve moved on because I had to and it’s been the best thing I could have ever done for myself. When I’m feeling nostalgic for our relationship I realize it’s not you I’m missing, but who we used to be. I miss being in a relationship, that’s all.

  1. I miss being a part of a couple. Now that I’m single, I realize it’s not the worst thing in the world. However, I still miss being one of two. I miss having another half. Now I have to be whole on my own and that’s okay, but I still miss being a part of something bigger. It’s not that I want you back, I just want to be with someone again — someone who’s not you.
  2. I miss not having to be alone. Being alone sucks. Sure, going out with your girls is fun, and embracing the single life can be good for a while, but my end game is still to find a guy I love. That’s the goal here — happily ever after. I haven’t given up and I’m not going back to you, but I have to admit that I miss not feeling so alone.
  3. I miss believing that I’d found “The One.” I’ve faced the fact that you were definitely not the guy for me but I miss the hope I had that you were. I miss the feeling of possibility in our relationship. I might not want that same possibility of a future with you anymore, but I definitely want to feel it again with someone else.
  4. I miss my innocence. I used to be able to trust people without much hesitation, but that’s gone. You ruined that for me. Now I’m plagued with the memories of betrayal by the one person I thought would never hurt me. It’s hard to date after a broken heart. I just want to be able to let my guard down but I can’t. I’m still protecting my heart out of the fear of dating another guy like you.
  5. I miss the person I was when I was with you. Well, at the beginning that is. You used to challenge me and I loved that, but eventually, it just felt like you wanted me to be another version of you instead of my own person. I miss those two kids we used to be, so innocent and in love. Life was simpler back then, and you were better than the man you are now.
  6. I miss having a boyfriend. I don’t really miss you, I just miss the comfort of having a boyfriend. I miss feeling safe in someone’s arms. I miss having someone to Netflix and actually chill with, to spend my days with and eat my meals with. I miss the romance and I miss love but despite all that, I don’t miss you.
  7. I miss the person you were when we fell in love. Who you are now is a nightmare. We were just kids when we started dating and as we grew up, I guess we grew apart. It wasn’t just that we were going in different directions, though. You grew into a version of yourself that I didn’t like or even recognize. I loved the person you were, but I hate the person you became.
  8. I miss seeing the world through rose-colored glasses. I know that things weren’t always great, but when they were, I saw the bright side of everything. I believed that people were truly good, that the universe had our best interests at heart, and everything seemed a bit more bright and hopeful. I still have a bit of that now, but love has a way of highlighting the silver lining and I miss that.
Kelsey Dykstra is a freelance writer based in Huntington Beach, CA. She has a bachelor’s degree in Creative Writing from Grand Valley State University and been writing professionally since graduating in 2013. In addition to writing about love and relationships for Bolde and lifestyle topics for Love to Know, she also writes about payment security and small business solutions for PaymentCloud.

Originally from Michigan, this warm weather seeker relocated to the OC just last summer. Kelsey enjoys writing her own fictional pieces, reading a variety of young adult novels, binging on Netflix, and of course soaking up the sun.

You can find more about Kelsey on her LinkedIn profile or on Twitter @dykstrakelsey.