A Guy Reveals 10 Big Secrets Men Keep From You

No matter how well you think you know the man in your life, there’s a good chance there are plenty of things he’s not telling you. In fairness, I’m sure women keep their fair share of secrets too. Even in a committed relationship, people have a right to some privacy, right? If you’re wondering what you don’t know about your guy, here are some of the most common secrets men keep from their partners.

  1. We have emotional needs too. Most guys will never fess up to this privately because we don’t want to go into detail about our exact emotional needs. However, they do exist no matter how much men try to make you believe that we fit the archaic definition of masculinity. The truth is we need to feel appreciated and wanted and we will feel unfulfilled in a relationship if those emotional needs aren’t being met. This is one of the biggest secrets men keep because most of us were never taught that it’s okay to express ourselves this way.
  2. We need your support. Yes, men do tend to act as if we’re lone wolves, but we secretly require the support and help of a partner. We need to know that you have our back and that you believe in us. Of course, we’re not going to come out and say this, which is why this is one of the biggest secrets that men keep.
  3. Our friends don’t like you. To be fair, this isn’t always true. It’s possible for you ladies to win over your partner’s friends. That being said, if they don’t like you, we will do our best to keep that a secret from you for as long as possible. We’ll also try to make sure that they’re at least nice to you and don’t make it obvious that you’re not their favorite. If your boyfriend’s friends don’t go out of their way to embrace you, there’s at least some chance that they not fans of yours.
  4. We were dating other people when you met. Again, this isn’t the case every time, but guys aren’t usually open about it if that’s the case. We know that you want a long-term relationship to feel like a fairytale that ends happily ever after. We also know that no fairytale involves dating multiple people in the beginning. The important part is that we ultimately chose you, which is why we keep it a secret if there were other people at some point.
  5. We have a history of cheating. Even guys who say they’re being honest won’t tell you about past occasions when they’ve cheated on you. Granted, you probably have the right to know this information, but it’s information that you’ll have to drag out of him. From our perspective, there’s nothing to gain from sharing our past infidelity. As long as we’re faithful now, that’s all that matters.
  6. We have physical insecurities too. Ladies, don’t think that you have the monopoly on physical insecurities. Guys can have body image problems too. After all, we tend to be rather superficial, which can also apply to ourselves. If there is something about our bodies that we don’t like, we can be just as sensitive and insecure as any woman.
  7. We think your friends are hot. If you have pretty friends/siblings/colleagues, just assume that we’ve noticed. We’re not going to tell you outright because we don’t want you to feel insecure. We also don’t want you to get mad at the other person. It doesn’t mean that we don’t adore you, it just means that we recognize when someone is attractive. We’re only human, after all.
  8. We lie to avoid fights. Most guys prefer to keep the peace in a relationship. I mean, we do want to make you happy, but we also want peace and quiet. That can lead to little white lies that we tell so that we don’t get in a fight. Naturally, we keep those lies a secret from you in the interest of not picking fights.
  9. Our past sexual adventures are many and wild. For starters, a lot of us won’t share with you the real number of past sexual partners we have. Perhaps you can tell when a guy is lying. If not, the real number may remain a secret. A guy is also going to keep secret any embarrassing sex stories. I mean, we all have at least one, right? But you ladies are unlikely to ever force him to reveal that secret. Also, we will also try to hide the fact that we unknowingly slept with one of your friends or co-workers before we met you. There’s nothing good that can come from that information coming out, right?
  10. We still have a porn collection. Believe it or not, your long-term partner most likely still has a porn collection. There’s a lot that women just don’t understand about men and porn, which is why we keep our stash quiet. You can ask, but we will deny, deny, deny unless you actually find it and we have no choice but to fess up. Just don’t think that our secret porn collection means that we’re somehow unhappy in the relationship. It definitely doesn’t!
Bryan Zarpentine graduated from Syracuse University and lives in upstate New York, where he writes largely about the world of sports. His work has appeared on Franchise Sports and WSN, among others. You can find him on Twitter @BZarp.