A Guy Reveals 10 Things Women Don’t Understand About How Men Text

Like it or hate it, texting is a huge part of relationships nowadays. You can try to resist it if you want but there’s really no point. That being said, it’s important to realize that some people have a completely different approach to texting. In fact, there are some things women just don’t seem to understand about how men text, which is why I’m here to enlighten you ladies.

  1. We keep it short and sweet. The first thing all women need to know is that most guys don’t like texting. Women tend to love it, but we don’t really feel the same, which is why we like to keep our texts short and to the point. For us, it just doesn’t make sense to take up large quantities of time typing out long, drawn-out messages. This means you can’t always get a read on a guy if his texts to you are brief. He may like you even if he’s curt. Of course, if you have a guy texting you in paragraphs, it’s a great sign that he likes you because he thinks you’re worth taking the time to do something he doesn’t really love.
  2. We’re not marathon men. In addition to keeping texts short, most men hate marathon texting sessions. We’re usually busy and don’t want to be texting back and forth non-stop all day long. Again, you shouldn’t take this personally. If a guy likes you, he may put up with it, but texting marathons can be overkill from a guy’s perspective, eventually causing the conversation to drag, which doesn’t help either party.
  3. The filter goes away when we like you. Most guys tend to be careful and calculating when we text. However, if a dude genuinely likes you, the filter is likely to be put on the shelf. He’ll stop trying to play games and start being honest with you. If his texts sound unusual and silly, consider the possibility that he’s really smitten with you and has removed his texting filter.
  4. The longer the wait, the better (sometimes). OK, so nobody likes waiting a long time for someone to respond to a text. However, sometimes it’s a good sign if a guy takes his time responding. For guys that routinely text with a large number of women, they’ll have a routine and will text girls the same old things time after time. If you find yourself waiting for him to return a text, it could mean he’s broken off from his routine and is thinking about the best way to respond. This indicates that he likes you and cares about what he’s saying to you.
  5. More can be better (for us). As mentioned, most guys aren’t frequent texters. Of course, there are exceptions to every rule. If a guy is always the one who texts you first and doesn’t seem to have a problem sending you lots of messages, there’s a good chance he’s got it bad for you.
  6. We hate emojis. We get it, you ladies love emojis. Most of us don’t. Quite frankly, there are too many emojis and what they mean is usually confusing. We just don’t have time to decipher what they mean, nor do we care to. Ladies, please try to limit your emojis to smiley faces unless a guy starts using emojis first.
  7. We’d prefer you to take it easy on abbreviations. Much like emojis, texting abbreviations should be kept at a minimum. For a lot of guys, they’re like a foreign language that’s difficult to learn. If you go overboard with the abbreviations, guys will have no idea what you’re trying to say and many of us will lose interest rather than trying to decipher the meaning of your texts. Deep down, most guys are part cavemen, so sometimes you have to play it down for us and keep things as simple as possible.
  8. Please text us first. If you exchange numbers with a guy, please be the first to text us. Again, guys hate texting so it’s usually up to you to send the first text. Most guys will be flattered and see it as confirmation that you like us. Once we have that confirmation, it’s a lot easier for us to let our guard down and admit that we like you as well.
  9. We keep the questions coming if we like you. If you’re unsure if a guy you’re texting is into you or not, keep track of how many questions he’s asked you. When we like you, we’ll always try to keep the text convo going by asking you personal questions. It may become a little annoying after a while, but I assure you it’s a genuine sign that a guy likes you.
  10. Texting shouldn’t be a dealbreaker. I will reiterate that men don’t take texting as seriously as women. Those are just the facts of life. Guys don’t understand that you might get upset if we didn’t text you enough on a certain day. Even if we like you, we’re not going to be perfect texters. More importantly, our texting habits shouldn’t be a deal breaker. Please let our actions speak louder than texts.
  11. Why do you get so uptight when you realize we don’t like texting? I get that it’s rude when we ignore you or give a one-word answer to a long message you’ve sent, but if you realize that men don’t really like texting, why does that offend you so much? If anything, it should make you realize that our texting etiquette (or lack thereof) isn’t personal, it’s just how we are.
  12. We’d rather just hang out. Instead of writing those paragraphs upon paragraphs of text, don’t you think it would be better if you waited to tell us your anecdotes and opinions until we’re actually together in person? It’s a much better way to gauge our responses and we’ll get your tone more too so we’ll be more involved in the story. It just seems like common sense to us.
  13. How we text has nothing to do with whether or not we like you. We know how women operate in that you’re always looking for “signs” that indicate our feelings for you. We also know that women tend to use texting as a litmus for how little or much one of us likes you. While I’ll fully admit that we tend to make a bit more of an effort if we do really like you, it’s still likely not going to be on par for what you’d expect and what you want from us, so it’s probably not a good way to judge.
Bryan Zarpentine graduated from Syracuse University and lives in upstate New York, where he writes largely about the world of sports. His work has appeared on Franchise Sports and WSN, among others. You can find him on Twitter @BZarp.