It’s Hard To Trust Guys When So Many Of Them Are Liars

I used to strongly believe in trusting someone until they gave me a reason not to, but the more jerks I date, the more the opposite becomes true. I have a hard time trusting a guy from the start. I know it’s not entirely fair (and I’m working on it), but honestly, can you blame me? I trust new guys only to end up disappointed time after time, and it seems easier to brace myself from the beginning rather than deal with the pain that comes from being blindsided later. It’s pretty hard to trust some guys when so many seem to be liars.

I’ve been made so many false promises for the future. I’ve felt like a deer caught in the headlights on more than one occasion when guys have told me they see me in their future, talk about making real plans together, and then blindside me with a breakup or some other type of shady BS. It makes me feel pretty damn stupid, and I refuse to keep repeating that same pattern of being naive.

I’ve been told I’m the only one when I was actually part of a flock. I’ve dated guys that have given me no reason to question their seemingly genuine intentions, only to find out that they were dating a ton of other women on the side. I’ve let my guard down multiple times to give a guy the clean slate I felt he deserved, but it’s bitten me in the ass every single time so far.

Technology makes it so easy to lie. It’s so easy for guys to get away with acting shady because there are multiple ways to cover up the truth. There have been times that I’ve dated guys only to find out later they had a girlfriend the entire time. All they had to do to hide it was adjust a few privacy settings on their social media and avoid my friend requests. It’s complete BS.

Honesty just isn’t valued anymore. So many people no longer believe that they owe anyone the truth. From ghosting and bread-crumbing to benching, there’s an insane sense of entitlement everywhere. It truly sucks in the world of dating when you’re an honest person who’s just hoping to find real and genuine love.

Is it better to protect myself or keep having my vulnerability stomped on? I really would love to wake up one day and magically trust every single guy I come across, but I also know I need to be smart. Some might say that I should trust a guy until he proves that I shouldn’t, but I feel it’s a lot smarter to make a guy earn my trust first. In other words, prove it or GTFO.

I feel like a fool for allowing this to happen so many times. I’m done with being that easily convinced girl who falls under a spell of chemistry and fantasy with a guy just because he says some cute crap or buys me flowers a few times. I’ve learned my lesson, and even if it doesn’t seem fair, it isn’t fair that I’ve been fooled so many times either.

I really wish this wasn’t so common but sadly, it is. Unfortunately, my fellow ladies know this all too well. Some guys will say just about anything to get you to trust them so they can get what they want from you. This behavior has been around forever, but it seems to progressively be getting worse. Ugh.

I don’t want to be that girl who acts jealous, so I just bow out instead out of fear. I’ve never truly been the jealous type and with the way some guys have lied to me, it’s actually surprising that I’m not. Instead, when I get an uneasy feeling in my gut, I follow it and usually walk the other way. Perhaps those guys actually did nothing wrong but confronting them with what I’m afraid of because it’s happened too many times before only makes me look like I’m insecure and jealous. I’d rather be on my way towards a guy who doesn’t give me that uneasy feeling like he’s hiding something or isn’t being genuine.

I can only hope that there’s a guy who will prove to me he’s worth trusting. At this point, all I can do is hope that all those fears and doubts will fall away naturally with the right guy. Though I might not completely trust any guy right off the bat, I have to believe that all it takes is just that one guy to change my perspective. Until he shows up, it’s just going to be so damn hard.

Read more:

Share this article now!

Jump to the comments