If He’s Flirting With Girls In Front Of You, You Need To Dump Him Now

You would think that flirting with other women in front of your girlfriend is an obvious no-no, but to many guys, it’s basically everyday behavior. Needless to say, that’s just not cool. If your partner is doing this, it’s time to kick him out of your life and leave him to the women he couldn’t tear his eyes away from even while you were right by his side.

  1. He’s clearly not ready for a committed relationship. Do you really think a guy who can’t even keep his attention on you is ready to commit? The fact that he’s still flirting even though he’s supposed to be in a relationship should tell you that he can only handle casual right now. Don’t fool yourself into thinking he wants something serious, because his behavior is clearly showing otherwise.
  2. He’s addicted to the attentionHe’s the kind of guy who needs outside approval to know he’s a worthy human being. That crap is not coming from within. A part of you feels for him because it’s obviously coming from a place of believing he’s not good enough as he is, but the fact you have to deal with his constant need for attention is not what you signed up for. You want a boyfriend, not a puppy.
  3. He’s using it as a way to sabotage his chance at something real. He’s not even fully aware he’s doing this, and once you realize he’s ruining every chance at a relationship for himself, you can’t help but get a little sad about the whole thing. It’s not that he doesn’t want to be with you, it’s just that he doesn’t think he deserves you. So in order to keep himself from getting too close, he flirts. He sending you a message of “I don’t need you, see?” Take the hint and move on because it’s never going to stop unless he fixes himself.
  4. It’s embarrassing for you. Who wants to sit through a conversation about how low the waitress’ top is? You’ve been through these situations before and it’s painful for both you and the girl involved. It’s as if he’s testing your patience or something. You deserve to be with someone who actually cares about your emotional well-being, not someone who makes you feel like a fool.
  5. He has extremely low self-esteem. Do you really want to be with a guy who covers up his deep-seated shame by portraying himself as a playboy who can get any girl he wants? He already has you, but that’s not good enough — he needs the world to love him. At this point, nothing you do will ever quench his thirst for earning acceptance from every girl he sees, so it’s probably best to end it while you can.
  6. He thinks he’s better than you. When he’s flirting with these girls, what he’s really saying is “Look how much more valuable I am than my partner, random girl.” He’s using other people to show you that he’s a catch and that you’d better hold onto him tight. To him, i,t’s like a competition. To you it’s just juvenile.
  7. His defensiveness is proof he’ll never change. The one time you did talk to him about it, he totally got offended and started explaining how he only does it for fun. You try to tell him that it actually hurts you when he flirts with other girls, but he just sees it as you trying to hinder him. If he’s not up to even discussing it or seeing things from your perspective, chances are he’ll be flirting ’til he dies.
  8. Flirting with strangers is more important to him than your needs. He puts the game of flirting before your feelings, and that’s so not cool. If he doesn’t think you’re important enough to retire his flirting habit, then he doesn’t deserve your love. If you found out that something you did made him uncomfortable, you would stop it right away because you care for him. If he can’t do the same for you, it’s time to retire this relationship permanently.
  9. He’ll neglect you in other areas. Not only does he ignore you when a hot girl walks by, he also ignores you when he’s watching the game or hanging out with his friends. He’s got a case of relationship ADD, and it’s not your job to keep him focused. Next thing you know, he’ll be bailing on dates and ignoring texts. Take the flirting as a sign of worse things to come.
  10. He’s being selfish. If he can’t even focus on you for the duration of your brunch date, imagine what else he’ll drop you for. Guys who flirt a lot tend to think the world revolves around them. Whatever he wants, he gets and he will be damned if you stop him from living the life he wants. Unfortunately, a relationship takes two people to work.

Why men start flirting with other women despite being taken

  1. He doesn’t think it’s a big deal. Some guys are always flirting because it’s just built into their personalities. They don’t mean any harm by it and they’re not actively trying to cheat on their partners, it’s just who they are. It could be that your boyfriend is flirting with other women because he’s just a super friendly, flirty guy. That doesn’t make it any easier to deal with on your end, of course…
  2. He thinks he can have his cake and eat it too. He’s in a relationship with you and he likes it, but he also doesn’t want to completely give up playing the field. Short of actually going out and sleeping with other women, he likes to engage in what he believes is relatively harmless flirting to make him still feel like he’s a hot commodity. He needs to grow up a bit.
  3. He’s not serious about you. This is a tough pill to swallow but it could be true. If he feels like flirting with other women is something he needs to do despite having such a catch on his arm and in his life in you, he clearly doesn’t recognize what’s right in front of his eyes. If he meant to have a serious relationship with you, he wouldn’t be doing this.
  4. He doesn’t respect you. Again, this sucks to hear, but it’s important that you do. If you’ve voiced your frustration/anger/sadness over him flirting with other women in front of you and he continues to do it anyway, he’s being completely disrespectful. You cannot be in a relationship with a guy like this, nor should you be.
  5. He’s trying to make you jealous. An immature tactic and one that backfires more often than not. Flaunting other women in front of your face to make you want him more or worry that he’s going to leave you is again, disrespectful and childish. Leave him to flirt his heart out – just don’t be there when he gets back.
Jennifer is a playwright, dancer, and theatre nerd living in the big city of Toronto, Canada. She studied Creative Writing at Concordia University and works as a lifestyle writer who focuses on Health, B2B, Tech, Psychology, Science, Food Trends and Millennial Life. She's also a coreographer, playwright, and lyricist, with choreography credits for McMaster University’s “Spring Awakening,” “Roxanne” for the Guelph Contemporary Dance Festival, and “The Beaver Den” for The LOT, among others.

You can see more of her work on her Contently page and follow her on Instagram @jenniferenchin.