How Dating Is Different In Movies Than It Is In Real Life

If rom-coms made you dream of one day going on some amazingly romantic dates, you were probably sorely disappointed by reality. In the movies, the girls got all glammed up in heels and the guys were business casual. The dates usually involved a horse and carriage ride and a perfect kiss goodnight. In real life, first dates probably involve a drink (two if you’re lucky, three if it’s really going well) and endless freak outs about who’ll text first. Unless your life is actually an adorable romantic comedy, it’s more than likely that you’ve been on your share of dates that are nothing like the movies.

A romantic dinner is just plain awkward.

 When you’re getting to know each other you’ll spend more time chatting than actually enjoying the meal. Then, you’re stuck sneaking off to make sure your food hasn’t ended up all over your outfit and/or face. If the guy ends up being a stone cold weirdo there’s no escaping him halfway through. Plus, prepare for a doggy bag that you’re awkwardly carrying at the end of the night, making a kiss at your door seem strange.

Anything elaborate for a first date would be overwhelming.

If you watch The Millionaire Matchmaker, you’ve seen plenty of helicopter/cooking class/salsa dancing dates that seem romantic but would be awkward IRL. Admit it — unless you were super duper into him, if a guy showed up at your door with a dozen roses and plans to whisk you away in his private ‘copter you would be just a little bit freaked. You don’t want a date that’s Netflix and chill, but something in the middle is ideal.

No one ever gets inappropriately drunk onscreen.

In movie dating, no one ever has a few too many cocktails. In fact, if you do watch The Millionaire Matchmaker Patti Stanger warns against having more than two cocktails. On a real date, you probably have a glass of wind to unwind at home, and if it goes well a few more drinks, especially if you’re bar hopping. By the end of the night you’re ready to rage but also regretting going rogue.

Real first dates usually take place at bars.

While a “dive bar” might be overkill, it’s not like the bars you’re venturing to when you meet Tindermen are exactly elegant. You don’t expect a fancy dinner, but when drinks are dirt cheap and you wonder if you caught something in the bathroom you’re not exactly in the mood for love.

A kiss on your stoop can get weird.

If a date has seemed promising, by the end of the night you’re wondering how it’ll end. Maybe you’ll have your first kiss or he’ll plan your next date before this one is over. So there you are, lurking on your stoop, or at a subway stop, or in a taxi cab, making out. If you hate PDA it’s always going to feel a little strange kissing a stranger out in the open.

Dressing up is overrated, especially if you’re coming from the office.

Most first dates happen on weeknights when you’re heading home from the office and exhausted. While you’ll freshen up your makeup, you’re not exactly going to change into a little black dress on a random Wednesday. In the movies, everyone on a date is in a slinky dress that real humans can’t afford with super high heels. If you greeted a date in that at a lowkey bar he would probably be completely freaked out and wonder if you were going to a black tie event later in the evening.

Just because he seems into you doesn’t guarantee a second date.

In the magical world of movie-land, when a guy seems super into the leading lady and guarantees that he’ll take her somewhere special soon, it actually happens. In the real world, a guy might say a whole slew of things and then forget about you the next time he’s on Tinder.

In the movies a first date equals a long-lasting relationship.

Movies mean a first date leads to an even more romantic second date and then a montage with adorable activities and perfect pop songs. In the real world, guys think a first date makes you available for an anytime hookup. It’s weird because obviously they know what dating looks like, but they’d rather send a “u up” text than grab a meal.

No guy ever tries to “Netflix and chill” after a first date in the movies.

After a first date that’s kind of gone well (and some that haven’t at all), it’s expected that a guy will ask you to go home with him. This can be particularly awkward if you weren’t feeling the date and even more awkward if you wanted him to try just a little bit harder. It’s always weird when a dude you were planning on starting a relationship with casually sees if you want to get a drink at his place after a first date. You have to wonder if anyone waits at least until the second date for the propositioning to begin.

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