How To Learn To Love Being Single Instead Of Dreading It

While the Disney movies of our childhood leave some of us longing for our fairytale romance, life can have other plans. It’s no secret that being single can come with the potential for loneliness. However, it can also be a chance for positive change, a time to discover oneself, to love and accept yourself, flaws and all. Here’s how you can learn to thrive in your independence rather than dreading the single lifestyle.

  1. Realize you have more time to pick up a new hobby. Being single means you have more time on your hands to learn something new. Consider taking piano lessons or learning how to water paint. There are so many different hobbies and niches to explore. Things like candle making or flower pressing are a good option, though your interests may vary. Now that you have more time to spend with yourself, you can pick up that abandoned book on the shelf you’ve been meaning to read and indulge in your creative desires. 
  2. “Date” yourself. Take yourself out and enjoy a night in the town. While going to the movie theater alone might take a bit of working up to, try perusing your local bookstore for classic novels or buy a tasty treat and a cup of coffee for yourself at a cafe. Take time getting to know you and what you love to do. The more time you spend on your own, the more comfortable you’ll be with expressing your individuality and planning your ideal night out.
  3. Prioritize your mental health. You’re the most important person in your life. Especially if you’ve been in toxic or harmful relationships in the past, being single is the perfect time to schedule a therapy appointment or focus on some meditation techniques. By cutting out toxicity, you can thrive as the beautiful individual you are as well as grow emotionally.
  4. Make new friendships. Just because you’re single doesn’t mean you can’t make new and meaningful relationships. Go out with friends or have a movie and pizza night at home. Although COVID makes hangouts more difficult, Zoom and Skype meetings are other great options to connect with your besties. Getting closer to your friends will fill up your social battery enough to realize you can still be happy without a romantic partner in your life.
  5. Appreciate the lack of unwanted judgment. Nobody likes being judged, especially in a romantic relationship where the opinion of the person you’re dating can matter a lot. Now that there is no added pressure, you can feel free to dress however you want, try that new hairstyle you were thinking about, or even get a tattoo! Remember that you are an individual first. No one can tell you how to live your life. Enjoy the breath of fresh air that being single can offer.
  6. Invest in your quirks and obsessions. Want to buy that new panda onesie and watch an Anime while eating cotton candy ice cream? Well, now you can! If you are someone who is obsessed with Marvel movies, Jane Austen, or murder mysteries, now is your chance to invest in these things. There’s no expectation on you to buy gifts for someone else. And, now you can focus on buying gifts for yourself. Save a bit of money every month and buy something fun no matter how silly you think it is. Investing in what makes you happy will vastly improve your outlook on life.
  7. Learn your love language. If you’ve been burned by a past relationship, or feel that you don’t even know what being loved means, try learning about the five different love languages. These are Words of Affirmation, Physical Touch, Acts of Service, Quality Time, and Receiving Gifts. Which is yours? You can even take a test to find out. By understanding how you like to be loved you can build up your own confidence in yourself. You can also get better at vocalizing what you need in a friendship or relationship. Being alone can give you a perspective on what kind of love you deserve.
  8. Practice self-care. The most important thing about being single is taking time to care for yourself, not only mentally, but emotionally, physically, and spiritually. That may mean taking a bath with scented oils and rose petals, journaling, or making yourself a fancy dinner. It’s important to treat yourself like you would want others to treat you. In this way, you’ll learn to appreciate your intentional moments of self-kindness that will vastly improve your happiness.