So you’re in a relationship that you thought was meant to be, but then your boyfriend dumps you and it feels like the weight of the entire world has come crashing down on your chest. You’re not ready to let what you had come to an end just like that and you think there’s a chance that you could get back together. If you play your cards right, you can make your ex miss you and want you back.
- Cease all contact with him. I know you want to text him that funny video you came across or just call him to see how he’s doing and let him know how badly you miss him. Maybe he’ll realize that his life sucks without you too and want to get back together. Don’t do this. Fight the urge to reach out to him. The last thing you want is for him to think you’re a needy wreck who can’t survive on their own. Pretend like he doesn’t exist. Don’t have any contact with him for a month or two.
- Figure out why things ended and try to fix it. Do you know the reason he broke things off with you? Is it something that you can work on? Think about the relationship you had and the areas that were problematic. Reflect on things he complained about or wanted you to change when you were together. Think of the role you played in the demise of the relationship and work on those issues. Obviously, if you broke up because he no longer had feelings for you, there’s nothing you can do about that except learn to move on.
- Give him a chance to miss you. Men usually take a while to process emotions so don’t expect him to instantly realize that he’s made a mistake by dumping you. He needs to experience what life is like without you before he can start regretting the breakup. Let him be the one to reach out to you first. In the meantime, focus on being your most amazing self. He’ll soon realize what he’s missing out on and come crawling back.
- Get a makeover. Rather than wallowing in despair or making pajamas and unbrushed hair your everyday look, use the breakup as an opportunity to reinvent yourself. Hit the gym, start running, join a dance class, take up a sport or any activity that can help improve your self-confidence and physical appearance. Dye your hair or get a new hairstyle, glam up your wardrobe. When he sees you looking all stunning and gorgeous, he’s going to be hit with a huge wave of dumper’s remorse. Hell, by that time, you might even decide you don’t want or need him anymore!
- Live your best life. Sitting at home and dwelling on your breakup is only going to make you feel worse. While you’re waiting for him to call, you can make the hurt go away by going out and having fun. Call up your friends and proceed to paint the town red. Try to swing by some of the places where your ex likes to hang out so he can see that you’re happy and trying to move on. Post pictures of yourself having a good time. When he sees you like this, he won’t be able to stop thinking about you.
- If he reaches out to you, play it cool. Once you fail to reach out, his curiosity will be piqued and he’ll likely contact you to see how you’re doing. When that happens, try not to lose your head. Don’t fall apart at the sound of his voice or the sight of his text. Keep your composure. When he sees that you’re not falling apart, he’ll start thinking that he’s the one who lost out by ending the relationship. Before long, he’ll be desperate to have you back.
- Let him wonder what you’re up to. Once he starts talking to you again, try not to let him back into your life too quickly. Don’t reply to his messages right away. He lost the privilege of speedy replies and undivided attention when he broke up with you. Don’t start telling him everything that’s happened to you since the breakup. You don’t need to be forthcoming with details about your life. The less he knows, the more he’ll be forced to wonder. This air of mystery will work in your favor.
- Get back on the dating scene. Jealousy is a powerful motivator. When your ex sees or hears that you’re going out with other men, he’ll want to win you back fast before he loses you forever. Knowing that other guys find you desirable will make him regret his decision to dump you. Once you start dating again, you might even realize that you deserve so much better him or find someone else you’d rather be with.