I’d Rather Be A Bitch Than A Doormat

I’d Rather Be A Bitch Than A Doormat ©iStock/fotografixx

I’m just a strong, badass woman who knows what I deserve in life and won’t accept anything less. That doesn’t mean I’m not kind, generous and compassionate, but it does mean that I refuse to let anyone walk all over me or take advantage of me. That may earn me the “bitch” title, but I’d rather be a bitch than a doormat any day, no questions asked.

  1. A bitch’s anger is stronger than a doormat’s despair. Being in tune with my emotions means that sometimes I get pissed off, but anger can be a great motivator. It makes me feel powerful and motivates me to fix or change what’s upsetting me rather than wallowing in despair. I don’t have time for that!
  2. Bitches get stuff done. Yes, Tina Fey was spot on about this. Bitches get out there and make things happen because they know what they want and they’re unafraid to get it. I’d rather be like this than become a doormat who walks around on eggshells, waiting for permission to live life my way. Hell no. It’s called being proactive, and I wouldn’t live any other way.
  3. I care more about being respected than I do about being liked. I have amazing friends who get me and who are happy to take the time to understand me and I value that. However, I care more about respect than being popular. If someone doesn’t like me because I don’t allow them to push my boundaries, they’re really not worth being in my life.
  4. I want to speak my mind. I WILL speak up if I don’t like something and I’m fluent in saying no to things I don’t feel are right for me. If this makes me a bitch, then I’ll gladly wear the title. It’s so much better than biting my tongue and being put in situations that make me uncomfortable, angry, or that I just don’t want to be in. That doesn’t mean I don’t know the value of compromise, but I’m certainly not afraid to express my opinions and stand firm when I feel strongly about something.
  5. I don’t put up with toxic guy behavior. There are plenty of toxic men out there and they all try their luck to take advantage of women, but I’m too much of a “bitch” for that. I know my standards and I’ll demand respect. If it’s not given, then I’ll GTFO before I get hurt rather than clinging on and hoping to change him. That’s just a recipe for disaster and never actually works!
  6. I’m not cold, I just master my emotions. It’s common for bitches to be seen as stand-offish or cold, but that’s BS. I’m just really good at mastering my emotions and not letting them rule me. I might love a guy, but I won’t put up with crappy treatment because of it. Love alone isn’t enough to make me stay and I can turn it off if I know it’s better for me to walk away.
  7. I’m about being real. Doormats sometimes stick with a bad guy in the hope that their relationship will change or they cling to their ideas of what they want their partner to be, even though he’s not a unicorn at all and never will be. I like to cut through all the lies, BS and delusions that people try to spin me to see things for what they are. People might not like it, but hey, it saves me precious time I don’t want to waste on fakers.
  8. I want to embrace my feelings. A doormat will hide her feelings out of fear of upsetting others, but you know what? Screw that. I’m not hurting anyone by feeling what I feel and I won’t allow myself to be censored. If people don’t like seeing my raw elements then they don’t have to be around me. Period.
  9. There’s such a thing as being TOO nice. When a person is too nice, they’re usually not being genuine. They’re trying so hard to be liked; meanwhile, they’re seething with resentment. They’re pushing aside their own needs just to impress others, but they end up lost and empty. It’s so messed up. I know when to choose myself over others and I value what I need. If that makes me a bitch, then so be it.
  10. I’m confident AF. No, it’s not arrogant — that’s just what people say when they’re intimidated by confidence and quite frankly, it’s lame. I prefer to call confidence an inability to cut myself down to size so as not to be intimidating to others. Screw that doormat attitude. I want to live life my way and be 100 percent me. If that’s intimidating or “bitchy,” the problem is with the people who are calling me that.
  11. I know I’m a queen. I don’t need to wait around for other people’s approval of me because I know my worth. This is what it means to be a boss and it’s so much more empowering than being a doormat who depends on what others think of her. I’d rather be a bitch any day of the week!
Giulia Simolo is a writer from Johannesburg, South Africa with a degree in English Language and Literature. She has been working as a journalist for more than a decade, writing for sites including AskMen, Native Interiors, and Live Eco. You can find out more about her on Facebook and LinkedIn, or follow her on Twitter @GiuliaSimolo.