If Someone Uses These 18 Phrases, They’re Secretly Desperate For Validation

If Someone Uses These 18 Phrases, They’re Secretly Desperate For Validation

Everyone appreciates a word of encouragement now and then. However, there are some phrases that, although they seem ordinary, are actually expressions of our desire for approval. If you or anyone you know uses these statements regularly, they’re secretly desperate for validation.

1. “I Worked Really Hard on This.”

When someone drops this line, it’s like they’re holding up a sign that says, ‘Please notice me.’ It’s not just about the work; it’s about wanting someone to recognize the effort. It’s like they’re saying, ‘A little applause wouldn’t hurt, you know?’ It’s a human thing – we all want our hard work to be seen and appreciated.

2. “Do You Like It? Be Honest.”

Ah, the classic call for approval disguised as seeking honest feedback. It’s a bit like fishing for compliments with a net made of honesty. When someone asks this, they’re often less interested in brutal honesty and more in need of a thumbs-up. It’s their way of saying, ‘Tell me you like it, but make it sound sincere.’

3. Want A Partner? Attract Love With The Power Of Your Mind.

Sweetn is a new research-based startup that shows you how to call love into your life with the power of your mind. Take our quiz, and try our tools—they can transform your energy and your love life in a few weeks. Just click here.

4. “I’m Not Sure This Is Good Enough.”

This phrase is the humblebrag’s shy cousin. It’s like putting out a feeler to see if someone will jump in and say, ‘What? This is amazing!’ It’s a subtle way of asking for validation without looking like you’re asking for it. It’s all about wanting that boost without appearing too needy.

5. “Nobody Ever Notices What I Do.”

This one’s a heart-tugger. It’s like standing on a stage with a spotlight and a microphone announcing, ‘I feel invisible.’ It’s a direct appeal for recognition and a bit of a nudge for some appreciation. When someone says this, they’re really asking for a moment in the sun, a bit of acknowledgment for their contributions.

6. “I’m Probably Not Good at This.”

Here comes the self-deprecation train, choo choo! This phrase is often a sneaky way of inviting others to disagree and shower them with reassurances. It’s like saying, ‘I’m going to beat you to the punch and criticize myself first, but what I really want is for you to tell me I’m wrong.’ It’s a roundabout way of fishing for some uplifting words.

7. “I Guess I’m Just an Overachiever.”

This one is a bit of a humble brag, but it’s also a cry for validation. It’s like saying, “I’m going to casually mention that I’m awesome, but what I really want is for you to confirm it.” It’s a blend of confidence and insecurity, looking for that external nod of approval to seal the deal.

8. “I’m Always the One Who Has to Do Everything.”

This phrase is like a mini-flare shot into the sky, signaling, ‘Notice me and my hard work, please!’ It’s a way of saying, ‘Can someone please acknowledge how much I’m juggling here?’ It’s not just about the workload; it’s about craving recognition for being the go-to person.

9. “I Don’t Know Why I Even Bother.”

Ah, the classic line of someone who’s feeling a bit overlooked. It’s like saying, ‘I’m this close to giving up, so a little appreciation might just keep me going.’ It’s a subtle way of asking for a reason to keep putting in the effort, hoping someone will notice and say, ‘We see you, and we’re grateful.’

10. “Did Anyone Even Read What I Sent?”

This one’s like standing in a room with a megaphone asking, ‘Hello, does anyone hear me?’ It’s not just about wanting confirmation that the message was received; it’s about seeking acknowledgment for the thoughts and effort put into it. It’s a quiet plea for engagement, not just a read receipt.

11. “I’m Probably Just Talking Nonsense, Right?”

Here’s a phrase that’s fishing for disagreement in a sea of self-doubt. It’s like saying, ‘I’m going to downplay my thoughts, but secretly, I’m hoping you’ll tell me I’m making sense.’ It’s a clever way of seeking reassurance while appearing nonchalant about it.

12. “It’s Probably Not a Big Deal, But…”

When someone starts a sentence like this, they’re often downplaying something they actually think is important. It’s like a subtle invitation for someone to say, ‘No, actually, it is a big deal!’ It’s a roundabout way of highlighting something they’re proud of or concerned about, hoping others will see its value too.

13. “No One Ever Thanks Me for Anything.”

This phrase is the grand marshal of the validation parade. It’s a clear, though slightly melodramatic, call for some gratitude. It’s like saying, ‘Is a little thank you too much to ask for?’ When someone drops this line, they’re really expressing a need to feel valued and appreciated for their efforts.

14. “I’m Probably Not Making Any Sense.”

This one’s like throwing a fishing line out for reassurance. It’s a humble way of saying, ‘Please, tell me I’m not rambling.’ It’s not so much about their confidence in what they’re saying as it is a subtle request for someone to validate their thoughts and make them feel heard.

15. “Just My Luck, Right?”

When someone drops this line, they’re not just commenting on their fortune; they’re inviting a bit of sympathy or maybe even a ‘No, you’re actually really lucky.’ It’s a gentle way of seeking reassurance that things aren’t as bad as they seem and that someone is there to empathize with them.

16. “I Guess I’m Just an Introvert.”

Saying this is often less about self-identification and more about seeking acceptance for being quiet or reserved. It’s like saying, ‘Please understand why I’m this way.’ It’s a soft request for others to acknowledge and appreciate their personality, without them having to change who they are.

17. “It’s Not Like My Opinion Matters Anyway.”

This phrase is like a quiet drumroll waiting for someone to jump in and say, ‘Of course, your opinion matters!’ It’s a slightly passive-aggressive way of hinting that they feel overlooked and are yearning for someone to disagree with their self-deprecation and affirm their value.

18. “I Don’t Get Invited to Many Things.”

When someone mentions this, they’re not just stating a fact; they’re subtly asking for an invitation, literally or metaphorically. It’s like a low-key way of saying, ‘I’d like to be included more.’ It’s about wanting to feel wanted and hoping someone will take the hint and extend an invite.

19. “I’m Used to Being on My Own.”

This statement, while independent-sounding, is often a veiled request for companionship or acknowledgment. It’s like saying, ‘I’m okay being alone, but it wouldn’t hurt to have someone notice me.’ It’s about seeking validation that being alone doesn’t have to mean being lonely or unnoticed.

Originally from Australia, Emma Mills graduated from the University of Queensland with a dual degree in Philosophy and Applied Linguistics before moving to Los Angeles to become a professional matchmaker (a bit of a shift, obviously). Since 2015, she has helped more than 150 people find lasting love and remains passionate about bringing amazing singletons together.

Emma is also the author of the upcoming Hachette publication, "Off the Beaten Track: Finding Lasting Love in the Least Likely of Places," due out in January 2025.