Here’s What Really Happens When You Finally Get Used To Being On Your Own

If you’re someone who relies on being around other people to be happy, spending large amounts of time alone can be daunting. But even if you prefer to be around friends, family members, or a significant other, learning to be happy when you’re by yourself is still crucial to living the happiest life possible. Here are just a few of the amazing benefits you get once you get comfortable spending your time with no one but yourself:

  1. You Stop Being Afraid Of Loneliness. Like any fear, in order to conquer it, you have to face it head on. When you’ve finally reached the point of being okay with just yourself, you realize you could live that way forever. That doesn’t mean you should avoid others and relationships altogether, but at least now you know you could end up all alone and be perfectly fine.
  2. You Know Yourself Better. Being alone is a process, and getting used to being alone takes time. During that time, you get to really know yourself because you spend a lot of time with just you. You’re able to build a relationship with yourself, reflect on your past, and dream about your future. You figure out your strengths and weaknesses. Spending time with yourself allows you to figure out what kind of person you are and what kind of person you want to be.
  3. You stop looking for a relationship. You’re no longer desperate for a relationship. Not just with guys, but also with friends, co-workers, maybe even family. When you get used to being on your own, you don’t feel the need to be around people all the time. That means you don’t make an effort just for the hell of making an effort. You only hang out with people because you want to, not because you’re bored.
  4. You start living for yourself. When you’ve embraced being on your own, you stop needing attention from other people. Instead of dressing up for a guy, you dress up for yourself. Instead of needing someone to tell you you’re pretty, you tell yourself. Your self-esteem grows because you’re the one building yourself up!
  5. You Have WAY More Energy. People take up a lot of time and energy. When you’re around them, you’re focusing on them — making them laugh, helping them get over their breakups, and making sure they’re happy and content. You might have never realized it before, but interacting with people can be very mentally draining. Being on your own allows you to see just how much people affected you — you’ll notice the dramatic change in your everyday mood and energy level.
  6. You Don’t Feel The Need To Settle. You’re incredibly selective now. Before, you would’ve been more inclined to go out with the ex-boyfriend who randomly texted you. Not anymore. You aren’t trying to fill a romantic void because you no longer have that void. Because of this, you’re less likely to experience heartbreak by rushing into a relationship with someone just because you don’t want to be alone.
  7. You Stop Caring What Other People Think. In order to get used to being alone, you have to spend a great deal of time with yourself — eating, shopping, going to the movies, and doing things you enjoy. At first, you might feel awkward eating at a restaurant by yourself. But soon, you won’t really care. You’ll stop worrying what other people think about how you look, what you say, and most importantly, your relationship status.
  8. Your Relationships Are More Meaningful. When you start to enjoy being alone, you start appreciating things more. You begin to realize how important other relationships are, too. You love being alone, and if you take the time to get a coffee with a friend, or go shopping with a relative, it means they’re someone who’s very important to you. You aren’t just hanging out with people for the Snapchat story or the Instagram post; you’re doing it to connect with them, talk to them, and see what’s going on in their lives.
  9. Your confidence skyrockets. The more time you spend with yourself, the more self-reliant you become. You discover that you don’t need other people for certain things — you can do them yourself. You become confident in your ability to be independent and make decisions without help from anyone else.
  10. You realize you’re already whole. Learning how to be alone isn’t easy to do. But once you finally do it, you feel amazing. Your confidence grows, your self-esteem skyrockets, and you’re more in tune with who you are. You finally understand why people say it’s important to take time alone before becoming a part of a couple.
Jordan White is a writer based in Scottsdale, Arizona with more than 8 years of experience. She graduated from Northern Arizona University with a degree in Rhetoric and Creative Writing in 2015 and while there, she wrote for The Daily Wildcat. She has since written for sites including FanBread, and, of course, Bolde. You can find about more her on Facebook. She has a passion for giving her audience something to laugh about and despises the heat more than anything.