Men are weird and can royally suck in the communication department, and it can really have you out here hearing phantom notification sounds or jumping to check your phone when someone else gets a ding. Here are 12 reasons you may not have heard back from him and are left in “read” suspense.
He’s not sure about you. Your conversations so far may have been dry and seemed like they had no purpose or direction. He could have been interested at first, and nothing is wrong or a distinct turn-off yet, but there’s also no spark. He’s not as excited to hear from you but also not completely convinced it’s time to throw in the towel. He needs to get to know you better to make a final decision. Things could go either way for you two at this point. Either way, the hesitation has slowed down communication.
He already had someone else. Sometimes breakups aren’t final. He might’ve started looking to put himself back out there thinking his recent split was a done deal, only to end up reconnecting with whoever he was already in a dating situation with prior. Now he has to cut off all the newly acquired prospects to focus on her again.
He’s not interested anymore. He may have figured out his initial impression of you was wrong or determined you’re just not what he’s looking for. If you just started talking and don’t have a defined relationship status, he may feel like he doesn’t owe you an explanation if he decides to stop talking. Especially if he was exploring multiple options, it can be tedious to go back and close several doors with the same copy and paste exit speech.
He’s keeping something to himself. He could be busy processing an emotion and not be sure what to say to properly express himself. He could be used to dealing with things privately and not want to dump it on you.
He’s avoiding a topic. If you’ve had a disagreement, he may be anticipating a confrontation. He may also think you’re trying to ask him to do something he doesn’t want to do. Unless he knows it will be a casual convo, he’s not trying to engage right now. He’s just not in the mood for expectations or anything heavy.
He’s feeling stifled. He may not be the type of person who wants to talk to their significant other 24/7. Sometimes people need time to decompress, be alone, or just not feel the responsibility of having to check in with someone every single day. He needs some space.
He’s trying to play it cool. He may feel anxious and awkward when it comes to dating. He wants to impress you, so he’s intentionally trying to go by the book by keeping the 3-day-rule and not double texting. He doesn’t want to seem overeager and lame. He wants to respond but is calculating his moves to have some game. He also wants to keep you on your toes and give you a chance to miss him and wonder what he could be up to.
He’s a crappy texter. He may just not be big on texting in the first place. Even if he was more communicative at first, that may have just been to hook you. Now that he’s comfortable, he’s reverting to his normal habits. He’ll get back to you when he can or remembers to respond.
He’s legitimately busy. This is always possible. But if you have a bad feeling beyond typical anticipation jitters, I wouldn’t ignore it. Your gut usually knows somethings up before you have solid evidence.
He’s committed. Unfortunately, there are a lot of married men lurking on dating sites. If he always takes forever to respond or is typically responsive during odd/late hours, it could be he’s trying to squeeze in a chat behind his woman’s back. This kind of guy could be more accessible during the workday or nighttime hours but disappear with no explanation for chunks of unaccounted for time otherwise.
You’re not a priority. Even people who normally take their time to respond will still jump up when it’s a message from the person they were specifically hoping to develop and maintain an intimate bond with. You should be spoken to regularly if you’re part of his normal routine. If you’re being filtered into conversations he’ll get back to, you may not be as important to him as he is to you.
He wants to gauge your in-person chemistry. If this is someone you just met and are in the talking stage with, especially if it was on a dating app, he could be tired of getting to know someone by phone only to meet in real life and feel no chemistry. He may prefer to keep convo to a minimum until he can feel someone out. He doesn’t want to invest too much before he knows what your vibes will be like offline.
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