How To Know On the First Date If He Wants A Relationship

First dates are a double-edged sword. We anticipate the moment when we sit down at a table in a crowded far on a Friday night and look into the eyes of a guy who could be our soulmate or someone we’ll want to run away from immediately. First dates are tricky since they’re full of judgment calls. How much should we drink? If we’re into him, should we stay and chat for 3 hours or should we head home after the first hour to keep the mystery alive? Do we like his sense of humor or does he even have a sense of humor? But maybe the biggest question of any first date is whether the guy actually wants a relationship or if he’s just dating around/looking to hook up. Here are some signs that he is in the market for something serious.

He mentions his upcoming vacation.

If a guy isn’t into you, why would he mention the trip he’s about to take to Europe? And the exact day he’s going and the exact day he’s coming back? If he’s giving you a ton of details about the trip, then you can be pretty sure he wants you to know exactly where he’s going and why.

He asks about your interests.

If a guy wants to know about your reality TV addiction or the yoga classes you swear by, it’s a pretty good sign that he’s interested in this going somewhere. It’s a waste of time to get to know someone you don’t see anything happening with. And this goes both ways too, of course. If you find yourself asking him similar questions and are actually interested in the answers, you’re pretty smitten yourself.

He actually asks you questions. Period.

We’ve all been on those super dull dates when the guy just drones on and on about himself, his gym schedule and his weird hobbies. If he cares about getting to know you, he’ll actually ask so that he can.

He talks about the near future.

Mentioning the future on the first date is more than a little overwhelming. But if this guy talks about a movie he’s seeing next week, for example, chances are he’s hoping you’ll go to that screening, too, or at least suggest something else the two of you can do. And if he keeps talking about it, you know he’s just trying to find a way to work up the courage to ask you on a second date.

He doesn’t mention his ex.

You’ve met the rare man who realizes it’s just not cool to talk about exes on the first date. Hallelujah.

You don’t get the hookup vibe.

With all your other dates, you totally wished you could ask if they just wanted sex. You just have a good feeling about this one and you’re pretty sure he doesn’t expect anything to happen just yet.

He talks about his friends and family

. He’s already thinking about how you could fit into his world and he wants you to know about the characters that populate it.

He tells you he’s having fun and/or compliments you.

This can be creepy or flattering depending. Let’s hope for flattering.

He extends the date.

A second location is usually a good sign. So if you’ve spent three hours at the same bar and he suggests moving things to a nearby café, you can be confident you’re getting a second date.

He lines up the second date while the first one is still happening.

This is the biggest sign ever that he’s interested in a relationship with you. And of course he does: you’re awesome. So naturally, he can’t wait to see you again. So now you just have to decide if you feel the same way.

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