Modern dating is a joke. Swiping left and right on Tinder in order to meet someone who’s only going to play you by leaving you on “read” for a couple of weeks is BS and I’m done with it. I’m not going to let the normal millennial dating rules influence the way I date—I’m doing things my way.
- I’m Not Going To Wait To Text Back. Sometimes, I purposely wait to text a guy back so I don’t seem too eager. I mean, I don’t want him to know I spend every waking moment of my life with my phone in my hand (I’d like to seem less basic than that). Other times my response takes longer because I actually forget, which is just as bad if you ask me. It’s the equivalent of telling someone, “You’re so unimportant to me that I literally forgot you were a human being.” I don’t want to send that kind of message.
- I’m Going To Be My True Self. There’s no reason to pretend to be someone I’m really not just to get the guy. I’m going to by myself—my crudely inappropriate and energetic self—from the start of the relationship. If he doesn’t like it, then hey, at least we won’t waste each other’s precious time.
- I’m Not Going To Hide My Feelings. I’m not dating just to date. I’m not going to spend time with someone I don’t see a potential future with. If I’m dating a guy, it’s because I really like him—a fact that I’m going to share with him sooner rather than later. I wouldn’t want to date a guy for years only to find out he’s with me just because he was bored or waiting for something better to come along. I’m going to lead with my feelings, in order to make sure we’re both on the same page.
- I’m Going To Communicate. And not just via text. To be honest, I don’t want a majority of my conversations to happen through texting, especially with the fella I’m with. Communication is so important and it’s so easy to screw up when two people are relying on Snapchat and Instagram stories to do all the talking for them. I refuse to be the girlfriend sending arbitrary emojis in an attempt to get my point across. No, sir.
- I’m Not Going To Be Unnecessarily Picky. I’m not saying I’m going to lower my standards, but I’m definitely going to adjust them. I’m only in my 20s—it’s not realistic for me to want a guy who’s wealthy, over six feet tall, and who has his entire life figured out. I mean, it would be nice to find a man like that, but none of those characteristics are super important at the moment. I need to make sure my dating checklist has items that’ll complement me as a person.
- I’m Going To Listen. More often than not, guys say what they mean but I don’t actually listen. Instead of paying attention to what a guy says, I usually ignore and make my own interpretations. Needless to say, that’s something that’s gotten me in a lot of trouble and I’m not going to do that anymore. It takes too much time and energy to search for a hidden meaning in what anyone says. I’m not going to overanalyze—I’m just going to listen.
- I’m Not Going To Follow Their Social Media Activity. Honestly, I’m not a fan of following any boyfriend of mine on social media. In my experience, it’s never worked out in my favor. Then again, that could’ve been because of the straight a-holes I was dating. Either way, social media is the devil and I won’t be that girl stalking my boyfriend’s account in an attempt to catch him in some sort of lie.
- I’m Going To Compromise. I used to be a big believer in “my way or the highway.” But that ideology, clearly, isn’t a good one. Which is why, now, I’m a believer in compromises—discussing both opinions and then coming to a decision that both parties can both agree on. I’m okay with not always getting my way. Truly, I am.
- I’m Going To Be Honest. I’m not going to lie about anything. That might sound like common sense but we all lie to our boyfriends about something or other at some point, whether it’s how many guys we’ve slept with, how interested we are in football, etc. I’m not going to lie to the next guy I date because last time I did that, bad things happened. My ex-boyfriend surprised me with skydiving tickets one time, all because I told him on our first date that I liked the idea of skydiving, which definitely wasn’t true. Honesty is key. Honesty keeps you from jumping out of an airplane to experience the “thrill” of almost dying.
- I’m Not Going To Let Outside Relationships Define Mine. No relationship is perfect, no matter how #couplegoals they look on Instagram. If I compare my relationship with someone else’s, like my favorite celebrity couple (which is currently Sophia Richie and Scott Disick), I’m going to be constantly disappointed. Because unlike Sophia Richie and Scott Disick, my boyfriend and I probably won’t have the money to take a private jet to Mexico to get our beach on. I mean, unless I end up dating someone as wealthy as Lord Disick (prayers up).
- I’m Going To Treat People The Way I Want To Be Treated. This means I’m not going to ghost anyone. I’m not going to leave anyone on read. I’m not going to ignore someone’s texts but then send them an irrelevant Snapchat. I’m not going to lead someone on just because I’m feeling lonely and yearning for attention. I’m not going to break up with someone by slowly fading out in a hope that they’ll eventually get the hint. I’m going to do something not a lot of people do—I’m going to actually respect the people I date.