There’s no such thing out there as a universal type. Even the hottest people out there aren’t beloved by everyone. Let that fact reassure you if you’ve just handled a romantic rejection. Here are a few reasons it might not have worked out this time around.
- He could have just gotten out of a relationship. Consider it to be a good move if you just got rejected for this reason. It doesn’t necessarily mean that he isn’t into you, it just means he still has a lot to process regarding his last relationship. If it was long-term, it’s even harder to recover. Give him some space and see if things change in the future. They might not (and you should accept that), but if you play it cool and don’t act possessive over him, you never know.
- It’s possible you came on too strong. Sometimes when we really like someone, we over-project. Either you were too loud, laughed at an awkward moment, or perhaps you seemed a little vain. Think about the situation and let it play in your head once again. Were you really being your best self or were you trying too hard? If it’s the latter, you can always try again. Unless he outwardly told you to go away, it’s possible to make a new impression.
- He might know he’ll break your heart. Some women have a “long-term relationship” air around them when they meet new guys. If this guy knows he’s just looking for a one-night stand, it’s possible that he chose the gentlemanly path by not leading you on. Even if he was wrong with his evaluation, you’re probably best off not chasing someone for just a night of fun.
- He’s got a lot going on at work. As we get older, we start losing energy. If he has a big project going on at work, he probably knows that he just doesn’t have time for a relationship that’s starting with a “getting to know you” phase. It’s better that he’s honest about it. Nobody likes waiting around for a text, so dating someone with a greater availability is a bonus all around.
- He simply likes someone else. He may be a one-crush kind of guy. Relationships happen all the time, which means that people are often at different stages. If you’re in the “flirt” stage and he’s in the “one date away from asking someone to be my girlfriend” stage, there’s not a great chance that the two of you will work out.
- He might have a friend who’s into you. It’s breaking code to date someone that your friend is into. It may seem unfair at the time, but it shows that someone values their friendships, which is honorable. There are plenty of other eligible guys out there, so don’t worry — you’ll get over this one soon. If it was absolutely meant to be, who knows what the future might have in store?
- You might remind him of a sibling. It doesn’t even have to be looks-wise — it could be in mannerisms as well. This is a situation that makes total sense, even if it’s hard to hear. Try seeing the situation from his point of view. Not only will any sort of sexual chemistry be zapped, but there’s potential for people to ask him whether or not he sees the similarities. Avoid the awkwardness and just accept the fact that it probably won’t happen.
- Or, you might remind him of an ex. There are plenty of reasons why that relationship might not have worked out, but even if you share a haircut with an ex, you may be out of the running. Don’t think too hard about it — ultimately, it’s his loss. That being said, not giving you a chance is also his choice.
- He might not like women. And that’s totally fine. We can’t always tell what someone’s sexual preference is right away and there’s a chance he could be gay. There’s no changing his mind. Just don’t assume this is the case immediately if he’s not into you because that can come off as a little self-absorbed.
- He just might not be into you for no reason at all. Know the Dita Von Teese quote, “You can be the ripest, juiciest peach in the world, and there’s still going to be somebody who hates peaches”? It’s one that changed my life. Sometimes, people just aren’t going to be into you, and that’s okay. Even if you’d be the ultimate girlfriend to someone, it probably won’t be the guy who just doesn’t find you attractive for some reason. Again, there’s no universal type. Feel free to mourn what could have been, and move on.
