I Feel Like I Live In Neverland—Guys Never Grow Up

I live in a resort town full of local adrenaline junkies and tourists. If you live here, you’re obviously looking to make life a permanent vacation; we don’t live to work, we work to live. We’re the masters at dodging careers, adult responsibilities, and possessions. Be careful when opening up Tinder when you’re in town—you’ll be swiping right on Peter Pan and the Lost Boys.

  1. They come here to run away. People come to a “Neverland Town” because they need to ignore time. They want to run away to a bubble of people who are just like them, darting responsibility, ignoring the inevitables, and not being at home. This place draws people who want to escape what they’re doing and live in an adult fantasy land. So it’s important to ask: what are they running away from?
  2. They act like teenagers. The babe pool in a Neverland is quite… specific. Imagine setting your Tinder to 17-25, 5-mile radius, and currently unemployed. This may sound like the worst partner to you, but remember, this may also be you! Plus, who doesn’t love the idea of young love?
  3. No one wants kids, myself included. Do not come here if you want kids. I repeat, DO NOT come here if you want kids. Not only do we not want kids, we’re still kids ourselves! The ones who stay here long-term are the ones who don’t want kids now and will never want them. We’re not designing a life conducive to raising children: no money, no house, and no plans.
  4. People don’t stay long. In reality, most people are not interested in staying in a Neverland town forever; eventually, people do like to grow up. As it’s an escape from the rest of the world, there is a lot of temporary residents from all over the globe. A large part of the population, for example, is on two-year working visas. Although you get used to people coming and going, it can be difficult to invest in a relationship if you know the person is leaving soon.
  5. No one settles. Why settle for someone when you know the town has a rotating door of potentially better suiters? The sense of having endless amounts of time and human interactions means most people don’t need to settle for good enough. Everyone’s standard of adrenaline and lifestyle are very high, and so are their standards in partners.
  6. The wanderlust is in large supply. Are hippies your type? If yes, then this may be the perfect place for you to date! Many of the eligible bachelors and bachelorettes are doing yoga, eating vegan, and letting their hair grow. The lifestyle is a blend between seeking adrenaline and staying grounded. The feeling of home is in your people, but your soul is forever nomadic.
  7. The party never stops. Literally, the partying never stops. We don’t have kids to get home to, we don’t have high-pressure jobs to prepare for, and we don’t have social expectations we adhere to. Maybe this is you, but double-check because unless you want a guy who will crush beers all night next to you, then this isn’t your babe pool.
  8. We don’t fear old age. Living an active life that keeps everyone fit and nimble really delays the feeling of getting older. Our hearts are young and our memories are full of more than a lifetime worth of experiences. By the time we actually do get old, we’ll have probably lived nine lives! Dating someone so full of youth and life can sound really romantic and dreamy, but remember, some people change as they age—we don’t.
  9. Everyone’s poor. Everyone is living for adventure and unfortunately, adventure costs money. For every measly paycheck that comes in, people are brainstorming the cost of their next trip. We’re experts at last minute flight deals and sourcing cheap hostels because our paychecks ain’t big. When getting older isn’t a worry, no one is saving for the future. We’re too busy living in the now.
  10. I live here too, so I’m not exempt. I didn’t move to this Neverland to find love; I moved here because I’m looking for more adventure, I’m not ready to take on a corporate 9-5 job and I’m more interested in adrenaline and passion than marriage with kids. When I meet guys from outside this bubble, they’re charmed by my excitable zest for life, but they always eventually grow tired of my childish demeanor.
Rebecca is a freelance writer, obsessive skier, and avid yogi. When she's not in the alpine or on the mat, she is running Subjectively Me, a blog from which she inspires people to feel shamelessly honest.
www.subjectively.com
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