Important Reasons You Should Never Date A Guy Who Makes You Feel Insecure

When you’re in a healthy relationship, you should feel loved, supported, and cared for. While all couples go through rough patches, your confidence in your ability to work through things as a couple — and in his commitment to you and the relationship as a whole — should never waver. Dating a guy who makes you feel insecure about how you look, what he’s doing when you’re not together, or what his intentions are for the relationship is a terrible idea — you deserve more.

  1. He may have something to hide. If he’s consistently doing things to put you down or make you doubt yourself/him/the relationship, he’s either seriously screwed up or he’s legitimately doing something shady. Either option is terrible and you don’t need to put up with it, so don’t.
  2. Your boyfriend should embrace your flaws and love you despite them. Nobody’s perfect— so what? You might have a few shortcomings, but he does, too. If you can see past his and want to be with him anyway, what’s his problem? Making you feel crappy about things you can’t change or that you’re struggling to improve on isn’t something a guy who cares about you does, so ditch him.
  3. You should never let someone else’s opinion determine your self-worthYour self-worth is not based on the way anyone else sees you — it’s about how you see yourself. Never let a guy make you feel bad about yourself or like you’re not worth real, lasting love, because that’s BS. Lift yourself up and get away from him.
  4. Insecurity will drive you nuts in the end. If you’re spending your entire relationship second-guessing what he’s doing, who he’s with, what his last text meant, whether he sees a future with you, etc., you’re going to end up going nuts in the end, and for what?
  5. Why would you want to be someone who makes you feel bad about yourself? Who wants to be nitpicked and criticized all day? Being with someone who makes you feel insecure is like putting yourself through torture. There’s nothing wrong with a little bit of constructive criticism, but there’s also a fine line between trying to give someone advice and making them feel bad about themselves.
  6. You shouldn’t have to work to earn someone’s love. Any guy you’re with should love you for who you are, not who you could be. There’s a limit to how much effort you need to put into pleasing someone. Don’t exhaust your energy for someone who doesn’t deserve it.
  7. Your relationship doesn’t define you. You’re your own worst critic, and sometimes you can be way too hard on yourself. But your relationship doesn’t define who you are, and neither does the guy you’re with. If your boyfriend is making you feel like crap, you shouldn’t be doubting yourself — you should be leaving him.
  8. It gives you a warped idea of what love is. No, he’s not “keeping things fresh” or keeping you on your toes by never being clear about where you stand and how he’s feeling. In fact, he’s manipulating you for his own gain. The longer you put up with it, the more twisted your ideas about what love is and what you deserve from it will become. You don’t want to do that to yourself.
  9. There are guys out there who would never make you feel that way. Settling for a guy who makes you feel insecure is selling yourself majorly short. While you’re with this loser, you’re missing out on all the guys who recognize just how incredible you are and would be happy to treat you accordingly.
  10. You’re amazing just the way you are. Regardless of the negative comments and criticisms, just know that ultimately, you’re amazing just the way you are and you don’t need to change for anybody. You’re in control of your life and you have the last say in terms of how anyone makes you feel. Don’t let a guy make you feel insecure, and more importantly, don’t date a guy who makes you feel that way
Lindsey is a Digital Advertising Professional and Freelance Writer based in New York City. In her spare time, she enjoys running, traveling, and drinking ridiculous amounts of coffee. Follow her on Twitter @lindseyruns
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