No, You’re Not A Gold Digger If You Do These 10 Things

So a guy who barely even knows you calls you a gold digger, but what is he even talking about? He might be unfairly judging you according to these 10 things that actually don’t mean you’re after his money. After all, you have plenty of your own.

  1. You dress to the nines. You know how to dress well and make an effort with your appearance when you meet him for dates. Just because he thinks that’s high-maintenance, it doesn’t mean that you should quit. You’re dressing up for yourself, after all.
  2. You let the guy pay for the first date. While some guys might immediately assume that if you let him pay for the first date it means you expect him to pay for everything, that’s totally crap. Some women want a guy to make the first effort for the date if he was the one who invited them out. It’s chivalrous!
  3. You book weekly hair appointments. He sees you heading out to beauty and hair appointments and probably worries that he’ll be funding them if you get together. Whatever. Maybe he needs to get over himself. If you like to take care of your appearance, that’s your choice and doesn’t mean you want someone else to pay for all your manis and hair extensions.
  4. You ask him about his career. While asking him about how much money he makes can be a little OTT on a date, wanting to know about his career doesn’t mean anything weird. You don’t have dollar signs in your eyes, you just want to know that the guy’s ambitious and secure. What’s wrong with that?
  5. You don’t like camping. Maybe you don’t like roughing it by spending too much time outdoors. Or, maybe you don’t like getting your hair wet unless you have your hair styling tools on hand. Those things don’t mean that you’re high-maintenance or a gold digger, though. They’re just preferences, not a sign that you’re going to be rummaging through your partner’s pockets to fund a glamping trip.
  6. You talk about items you love. Have you ever spoken about a gorgeous car or pair of earrings you wanted to buy, only for your date to ask if you’re hinting that he must buy it? You were probably like, “WTF?” I mean, why is it okay for a guy to talk about all the cool stuff he wants to install in his man cave but you can’t talk about expensive goodies you want for yourself? Even if you’re materialistic, it shouldn’t be assumed that you’re a gold digger. Period.
  7. You reject unemployed guys. This can be quite controversial at times, but if you’re going on dates with guys who let you know they’re out of work and aren’t really the type to hold down a job when they get it, you might feel like they’re wrong for you. That doesn’t make you a gold digger. Instead, you’re a goal digger and want someone who shares your ambition. Again, nothing wrong with that. It’s your preference.
  8. Your friends are gold diggers. Just because you swim in a social circle in which your friends see other people’s money as being their goal, that doesn’t mean their tendencies are rubbing off on you. Hell no. You have lots of different friends, after all, and unless you’re sharing their views you shouldn’t be judged according to what they’re like.
  9. You date older guys. Okay, so maybe you’re not dating guys old enough to be your father, but some people might assume that if you’re dating a guy who’s 10 or more years older that you’re hoping to coast by on his money. That’s ridiculous! Maybe you just like being with partners who know what they want and where they’re going in life, right?
  10. You want to be romanced sometimes. Hey, every woman deserves to feel special! That’s not to say that the guy you’re dating needs to shell out big bucks for grand romantic gestures (hot air balloon rides are such love cliches), but it’s nice to feel thought of every now and then. That certainly doesn’t mean you’re a gold digger and if the guy you’re on a date with assumes that, then he’s got it all wrong and needs to chill.


Giulia Simolo is a writer from Johannesburg, South Africa with a degree in English Language and Literature. She has been working as a journalist for more than a decade, writing for sites including AskMen, Native Interiors, and Live Eco. You can find out more about her on Facebook and LinkedIn, or follow her on Twitter @GiuliaSimolo.