When you’ve been screwed over a lot or dated one too many jerks, it’s hard to remember that good guys actually exist. It might seem like looking for a needle in a haystack, it’s definitely not impossible. Here are some things to remind yourself of when you’re losing hope on ever finding Mr. Right:
- Good men are harder to find.That’s not because there isn’t good in all guys you come across, it’s just the reality that many of them won’t align with what you’re looking for in a partner. Sure, there will be jerks in the mix who won’t appreciate how amazing you are or treat you like crap, but that’s a small portion of the male population. Don’t discount an entire gender because of a few bad experiences.
- Sometimes we’re perpetually attracted to the wrong guys.It’s not to say that we keep picking the wrong guys purposely, but we do often get into patterns in dating where we seem to encounter the same crappy ending over and over again. Instead of telling yourself that all men are jerks, take some time to reflect on the qualities you seem to be attracted to.
- Revise your checklist — it’s limiting your search.When you finally come across the right guy for you, he probably won’t match up to the ideal you had in mind of what you thought you needed. A checklist only leads you to axing off great men with great qualities who might have blown all your expectations and been unexpectedly perfect.
- Date outside of your comfort zone.If you’re habitually dating a certain type of guy, try dating on the complete opposite side of the spectrum. It never hurts to try something new and changing your ways is the only way you can attempt to have better results.
- The good guys get looked over a lot. There are plenty of amazing guys out there who relate to your struggles and feel like they’re genuinely trying in love but don’t get the results they’re hoping for. Good guys want love just as much as anyone else and they’re often overlooked for dumb reasons. A lot of men are facing the same challenges women are in today’s dating world, so don’t think you’re alone in this.
- Mr. Right might be in the friend zone.We all have that one guy in our lives who’s awesome, who we hang out with and tell all your scary and tragic dating stories to, when in reality he’s just dying to have a chance at turning the relationship into something more. Why exactly are you discounting him? He could be exactly what you were looking for all along.
- Giving someone different a chance might surprise you.It’s scary at first, and the initial idea might turn you off, but as cliché as it might sound, the best things and people in life come along when you least expect them. When you take expectation out of the equation and just take a leap of faith, you might be pleasantly surprised.
- The right guys are worth the wait.Some days you just have to keep faith and know that good guys are definitely out there, and even though they’re harder to find, they’ll make all the crappy experiences worthwhile once you find them.