I Rarely See A Genuinely Happy Couple, So What Does This Really Say About Relationships?

I’ve never really been jealous of couples, even in my single AF phases — and why should I be? Sure, there are times when I see people who are adorably in love and aww-worthy, but most times, if I’m completely honest, the couples that I meet seem more like they’re stuck together than blessed to have found each other. What’s up with that? I may be wrong, but here’s what I think:

  1. People stay in relationships because they’re too lazy to break up. Perhaps they were high school sweethearts or they were each other’s first serious relationship. They’ve been together for ages and they feel like breaking up is just too much work. Besides, being single looks terrifying, and they have lost their survival skills in today’s dating jungle.
  2. People settle down only because they want to start a family. Many guys seem to decide to settle down when they feel it’s time to have a family, or when they are tired of sleeping around. We women do the same when our biological clock is ticking super loud and we kinda feel like it’s now or never. Kids are life’s big blessing, but if you have them with the wrong person, you risk a life of compromise and unhappiness where you do everything “for the kids.”
  3. Some are with someone because they are scared of being alone. Not everyone is lucky enough to have good friends. There are people out there that are looking for someone because they don’t want to face the world on their own or they don’t want to sit home alone on a Saturday night.
  4. Some people can only be with the person they’re supposed to be with. Some people are just looking for the male/female version of themselves. They strongly believe that’s what they’re supposed to be doing and they usually do so in a very non-emotional way, by making sure the other person ticks all the boxes or that they look good next to them down the aisle.
  5. People who don’t have the time or energy to look for The One just settle for anyone. They say that love will come to you so you don’t need to look for it like crazy, but some people are just so unromantic that they don’t want to wait or invest too much time in dating. They only want to find someone — anyone — close the deal quickly and ideally never have to think about relationships for the next 30 years.
  6. “Perfect” couples often cheat at the first opportunity. They always look so loved up in public and put on such a romantic show that they make you wish you had something half as good as theirs. But once their significant other isn’t present, they make it clear that their perfect happiness is just a facade and loyalty isn’t part of the deal.
  7. People that have strong feelings for each other more often than not end up breaking up. So many people that are great together don’t stay together forever. It might be that their relationship was too intense to stand the trials of long-term commitment and they could’t take the pressure. It’s a shame but that’s how strong emotions often work. They can turn love to jealousy, obsession, and even hate.
  8. Relationships are hard work. Making things work as a couple isn’t the fairytale “happily ever after” we see in movies. Relationships need compassion, kindness and lots of patience. In many ways, life is less complicated when you’re single, but that’s hard to understand when we expect a relationship to magically transform our lives.
  9. Those who are looking for something unique are usually single. It takes strength and guts to hold out for something really special. It means that you are brave enough to believe in love and that you aren’t willing to settle for any of the above unhealthy situations.
  10. Happy Couples exist and they’re the reason we’re single. Until we find someone really special, like they have, we’re better off single. They set the bar for us to believe that happy relationships are real and we, too, can find our soulmate.
Chrisa is a freelance travel and lifestyle journalist who is obsessed with urban life, big cities, and untold stories.