Terrible Tactics Men Need to Stop Trying, Because We’re Not Falling For Them

There are a lot of tricks men use to pick up women. These tactics can range from cute and endearing to creepy and infuriating. Even if the intention is good and pure, not all efforts to attract a woman are acceptable. These 7 tactics men use to pick up women need to die now.

  1. Ignoring you. The logic here is that depriving a woman of your attention will make her want it more. In practice, it’s just rude and manipulative. If a man is trying the “cold shoulder” on you, just play right back and watch him crumble.
  2. Backhanded compliments. Giving backhanded compliments to intentionally play on a woman’s insecurities is a real terrible way to try to pick up women. Saying things like, “You look so healthy!” or “You have such a pretty face for someone your size!” are comments said intentionally to lower a woman’s self-esteem and make her easier prey. Disgusting.
  3. Self-deprecation. Strategic self-deprecation is used to play off of the stereotype of a caring, nurturing woman. If they put themselves down, you may feel inclined to soothe them. Compliment them. Maybe go home with them. Instead, try saying “boohoo” or playing a tiny violin.
  4. Faking common hobbies. Faking a common hobby is essentially lying about having a base to grow a relationship on. Without any shared interests, any future relationship is likely doomed. Whether or not a woman wants to pursue something with a man she has no mutual hobbies with is a decision she should be able to make with accurate information.
  5. Agreeing with whatever you say.No one needs a yes man as a partner. If you suspect someone is doing this to you, try saying something like “I hate puppies” or “My favorite movie is Gigli” as a hilarious test.
  6. Pretending everything you say is interesting. For example, women know their moderate food intolerance is not super interesting. They’re just telling you so they don’t get sick on your first date, not to get their ass kissed about how fascinating and special that makes them.
  7. Finding excuses to touch you. I don’t have a hair stuck to my sweater, or an eyelash on my face, or need a reassuring pat on the arm. And if I do, I definitely haven’t invited any man to handle those things for me. Don’t touch me, creeper. It won’t bring us closer.
Holly Harris is a freelance writer, full time student, and mommy to a toddler sass monster. In her (nearly nonexistent) free time, you can find her lifting something heavy in her home gym or chugging vodka sodas with friends. She contributes to several other sites, including Elite Daily.