Dating in the golden age of social media and Tinder is tricky at best and awful at worst. While dating has never been simple, the fact that many of us rely on our smartphones to find love has definitely been a game-changer and brings its own set of complications. But whether you look for The One online or stick to real-life connections, here are 10 millennial dating trends that we need to say goodbye to ASAP.
You go on a few dates with someone and get along great. You laugh over drinks, maybe see a few movies, and have a bunch of stuff to talk about. You think this person has relationship potential. And then you never hear from them again. Sound familiar? This is usually referred to as The Fade-Out and while it’s never pretty to be on the receiving end, chances are you’ve done it too, in order to spare someone’s feelings. Don’t do this. Be straightforward and tell someone you don’t see this going anywhere. It will save them a lot of worrying and confusion in the long run.
Always looking for someone better.
Thanks to the multitude of dating apps, we can go on as many first dates as we want and always think it’s no big deal if we don’t click with someone because we can always just find someone else. But not everyone has chemistry, of course, and expecting a better option to appear might be unfair to someone you really have a chance with. Treat every first date as a potential love connection and really give it your best shot – then find someone else if you feel nothing.
Texting too much pre-date.
This is a big issue with online dating. You haven’t even met the person yet and you’re already having long conversations. It’s tempting to do this since we’re so used to texting, but it can backfire and give you expectations that might not be met once you’re sitting across the table from the person. Keep it to a minimum and wait to get to know them in person.
The almost relationship.
Call it our hook-up culture, call it being casual or being unofficial. Whatever terms you want to use, if you’re seeing someone for a month or 6 weeks and then whatever potential there was seems to just disappear, it’s an almost relationship. These can be super confusing because you get zero closure as to why things didn’t work out. And they don’t always look like a hook-up, either: often you’re doing all the stuff that couples do, except you don’t have the label. If you’re already behaving like a couple, totally comfortable watching Netflix together on Friday nights instead of needing to go out all the time and talking 24/7, why not make it an actual relationship?
Being afraid of labels.
We always think that guys are the ones who are scared to commit but girls are, too. A lot of people love being unofficial and having no pressure, just having fun. But if you’re into someone and things are going well and enough time has passed, put a label on it. It’s okay.
The social media brag.
Broadcasting that cute text your new BF sent you, compulsively updating photos of the two of you – not cool. Of course, you definitely should share stuff sometimes, but if you’re doing it every single day, stop. It just annoys everyone else and makes you seem insecure about the relationship. If it’s real, keep it to yourself.
Obsessing over One Little Text.
Seriously, we all do this, but it’s time to just never do this ever again. It’s just a text message. It’s just a few words. Nothing will ever be gained from worrying for hours about it.
Using too many emojis.
We’re grown people. Let’s not do this anymore.
Pretending to be fine.
A strange by-product of our casualness is acting like we don’t have any emotions at all. It may be 2015 and our generation is a lot different from previous ones, yet we’re still humans with feelings the last time I checked. Allow yourself to feel what you’re feeling because it’s definitely normal. If you like someone and they reject you after one date, it’s okay to be upset (and then brush it off, of course, because you’re awesome and they don’t know what they’re missing).
Being dishonest about your intentions.
If you love the single life and go on a date anyway with zero intention of actually being open to a relationship, you’re not being truthful with yourself or with the other person. This goes for both genders and definitely happens a lot. Don’t date for the sake of dating or because all of your friends are.
The world of dating is crazy confusing enough. Let’s all agree to stop these dating trends right now and make the search for love a much more pleasant place for all of us.
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