Why Does Innocence Turn Guys On?

While it can quickly veer into the creepy or downright illegal, it’s safe to say that a lot of guys go gaga over women who appear “innocent.” Many men are attracted to the coquettish, Lolita-esque figure over the “bad girl,” for reasons many of us don’t understand. So, why is it that innocence has the power to turn guys on? Read on to find out more.

What is the meaning of “innocence” as a personality trait?

Oxford Languages defines innocence as a “lack of guile or corruption; purity.” It’s also a euphemism for virginity, i.e. “losing your innocence” after having sex for the first time. However, what does the term mean in men’s eyes?

Some men would define innocence as a woman who’s still a virgin, which is a big turn-on for many of them. However, for others, it’s more of an overall quality signifying gentleness and sweetness. In other words, someone who isn’t jaded by the modern world. That’s pretty hard to find, in any case.

Is it a compliment?

That all depends on how it’s used. To more self-righteous and condescending guys, innocence can be somewhat of an insult. In this sense, they see an innocent woman as naive, unworldly, and potentially unintelligent. While that’s likely untrue, believing this is worthwhile. Guys like this see innocence as a turn-on because it makes them feel powerful. They believe that they’re able to take advantage of these women since they don’t know any better and will never figure out what these guys are up to.

On the other hand, it may be that the term is being used in place of more complimentary words such as “sweet” or “pure.” It could very well be that a guy is using this term in a heartwarming, affectionate way. Like most things in life, it depends on the context.

Why does innocence turn guys on?

  1. They’re looking for a replacement mother. This sounds strange, but hear us out. If a guy believes you’re “innocent,” he likely won’t expect you to stand up for yourself in the relationship. Because of this, he may assume that you’d be happy to take over the caretaker role in his life. You will do his laundry, cook his meals, make his appointments… all the stuff he’s fully capable of doing himself.
  2. They equate innocence with traditional femininity. Innocence can turn guys on because it’s strictly associated with women. When’s the last time you heard a man referred to as “innocent”? Probably never. This quality is gentle, sweet, and very feminine. It’s no wonder so many guys are so attracted to it.
  3. They assume you’ll be more loyal and honest. Innocent women would be less likely to lie, cheat, or be underhanded due to a lack of experience. At least that’s how many guys see it. Instead, they imagine you to be much more loyal, trustworthy, and honest with them — attractive qualities anyone would want in a partner, to be fair.
  4. They believe you’ll be more permissive. Again, if you’re innocent, some guys may assume that you lack a backbone. This means they can do whatever they want and they believe you’ll simply put up with it. They won’t expect you to stand up to them or call them out. This is particularly advantageous to really crappy guys, so beware!


  1. Innocence is a rare quality these days and is hard to find. In the 21st century, it seems like everything is corrupt. Sweetness and purity of spirit are in short supply, which is why when they do find it, men are likely to be into it.
  2. Sexually, innocence is extremely attractive. This probably doesn’t need much explanation. There’s something in men’s brains that can’t help but be sexually attracted to a woman who seems untouched. Is it creepy? Yes. Can it be a major turn-off for women to be infantilized and fetishized in this way?? You bet. However, it still holds true.
  3. They want to be the more powerful in the partnership. An innocent woman isn’t likely to be the one wearing the so-called pants in the relationship, is she? Instead, a guy would expect her to take a backseat and leave her strong, smart boyfriend (or husband) in the driving seat. For men who value power above all else, this is alluring.
  4. They don’t want to be weighed down by a pessimistic partner. How many people have you met that aren’t jaded by the world? Life sucks sometimes, and so does dating. It’s bound to get to you in the end. That’s why innocence tends to turn guys on. An absence of someone who’s been beaten down by life is almost unheard of these days.
  5. Innocence implies a lack of past relationship baggage. If you’ve been in the dating scene for a while, you may have a lot of emotional and mental scars that you take into future relationships. However, if you have managed to retain your “innocence” in this regard, many guys will see this as a turn-on. They believe it means they won’t have much heavy lifting to do and that everything will be smooth sailing.

In conclusion

While you might not think being seen as innocent is a bad thing, generally speaking, it’s not something you should aim for. While that quality should be cherished and prized in people. Instead, it often becomes a weapon for those with less than stellar intentions to take advantage of for their own gain. That’s never a good thing.

Bolde has been a source of dating and relationship advice for single women around the world since 2014. We combine scientific data, experiential wisdom, and personal anecdotes to provide help and encouragement to those frustrated by the journey to find love. Follow us on Instagram @bolde_media or on Facebook @BoldeMedia