Why Ignoring His Texts Might Be Good For Your Relationship

The guy you’ve been dating texts you and you want to respond immediately, which only makes sense. However, before you start typing a message back, don’t! At least not always. Here’s why ignoring his texts sometimes can be the best thing for you and your relationship.

  1. It shows him you have a life. If you’re always texting him within five minutes of receiving his messages, you’re sending the message that you have no life and that you’re always waiting to hear from him. Leave your phone at home every now and then and enjoy yourself. If you hear from him, it won’t kill him if you get back to him later in the day.
  2. It reminds him you’re busy. If you’re busy at work and your new guy keeps texting you, it’s clear that he doesn’t really care that you’re busy with something important. If you don’t ignore him for a while, you’re really telling him that you can push everything else aside for him and it’s okay for him to overstep your boundaries. It’s not. Nip this behavior in the bud before it becomes worse.
  3. It makes him work harder. It’s never a bad thing for the guy you’re dating to work a little harder and put in more effort, especially if you’re the one doing everything. By ignoring his messages for a while, you’ll be telling him that he’s gotta step up if he wants to keep you in his life.
  4. It makes him miss you. You want the guy you’re dating to want to contact you and see you, but if you’re always in his presence with your messages he won’t miss you. He won’t even know if he’s missing you and you really want him to feel that he does so you can trust when he says how much he likes you.
  5. It helps him take stock. Linked to the above point about making him miss you is how it’s good to give the guy some space and let him have some time to take stock of his feelings for you. If you’re always around, he might end up going through the motions but not really feeling the relationship. Be a bit out of reach and see how his feelings for you intensify – or not, in which case you know where you stand.
  6. It shows him you’re worth it. You know your worth and he should know it, too. If you’re always there for him when he wants you you’re basically showing him that he can take you or leave you. It’s all about him, and that’s not cool. Show him you’re worthy and won’t run after him, especially if he’s usually the one who takes days to get back to you. Yup, it’s good to give him a taste of his medicine.
  7. It makes you a bit of a mystery. It’s always good not to be an open book with the person you’re dating. It not only prevents you from being predictable, but it encourages the guy to want to learn more about you and spend more time with you. Resist the urge to send him pages of texts talking about your day when he can’t be bothered to send you a sentence.
  8. It makes you focus on other things for a while. You should never make a guy your entire focus because it’s unhealthy. You’ve got other important things going on and you’ve got other important people in your life. Don’t lose sight of that. In this way, leaving him on “read” for a few hours or a day is good for you.
  9. It shows him you’re not needy. You don’t want to seem like you need him to be happy. He should know that you want him in your life and he brings you happiness, BUT he’s not your oxygen. So move away from your phone a bit. He’ll be so much more drawn to you when he knows that you’re not a stage-five clinger.
  10. It shows him how you like to text. Sometimes the best thing about ignoring him a little is that you show him what your texting style is. So, for example, if the guy wants to text you all day, ignoring him for a few hours will hopefully send the message that you don’t like to text that much. In this way, you can sync your texting styles and have a happier relationship.
Giulia Simolo is a writer from Johannesburg, South Africa with a degree in English Language and Literature. She has been working as a journalist for more than a decade, writing for sites including AskMen, Native Interiors, and Live Eco. You can find out more about her on Facebook and LinkedIn, or follow her on Twitter @GiuliaSimolo.