I Wish People Would Stop Saying These Empty Words To The Person They’re Dating

Sometimes when in a relationship, we say things that we think we mean, but might actually not feel 100 percent. It’s important to be honest in a relationship, but when you’re caught up in your infatuation, your heart sometimes speaks instead of your brain. It’s time to take control of your words and stop saying these things when you’re in a relationship:

  1. I can’t live without you. This one might be the phrase that bothers me most.  My first thought it always, “Well, yes, you can live without them because you have for the entire beginning of your life up to the point where you met.” Maybe that’s just me being cynical, but believe it or not, you can in fact live without your significant other. I think what people mean to say is that they don’t WANT to live without their significant other. In my opinion, that’s almost just as bad, but at least it’s a bit less dramatic.
  2. It’s my fault. (when it’s not) I’ve said sorry for way too many things that weren’t my fault, especially when in relationships. I personally just hate to fight, so there have been many times when I just said sorry and took the blame even when I knew I wasn’t in the wrong, simply to end the argument. Needless to say, I’ve absolutely stopped doing this because from what I’ve learned in those experiences, it only makes things worse. You should never take the blame for something that isn’t your fault. It’s important for your SO to take responsibility for something that they may have done. You just can’t grow an honest relationship if they won’t come to terms with things they’ve done to hurt you.
  3. You’re the only person I need. Trust me, I’m incredibly happy with my boyfriend, but I need a whole bunch of other people in my life to keep me happy. My family that’s always been there for me, my friends that I couldn’t live without, my dogs that I treat like children — they’re all incredibly important parts of my life, and I’d be dishonest if I said otherwise.
  4. I’m the luckiest girl in the world. I’m very lucky to have my significant other, of course, but I WISH I were the luckiest girl in the world. I’d be buying scratch tickets much more than I currently do. I think it’s absolutely reasonable for you to call yourself lucky to be in a great relationship, but the luckiest girl in the world? I mean, come on.
  5. I trust you. (when you don’t) I’m the type of person that likes to start with a blank slate when it comes to every new person I meet — I trust you unless you’ve given me a reason not to. I try to ignore things that people may say because I think it makes the most sense to form my own opinions about new people. But when you’re in a relationship and your SO has given you a reason not to trust them, you shouldn’t. And the reality is that if you don’t trust them, you definitely can’t have a successful relationship. That’s why it’s important not to tell your SO that you trust them when you don’t. Who wants to be checking text messages, hovering over their shoulder when they’re on Facebook, and checking up on them to make sure they’re where they say they are? I sure don’t have time or patience for that.
  6. I’ll never leave you. Even if you’re with someone that you see yourself starting a life with, I think making the promise of never leaving is unfair. You’re telling me that if they became a serial killer you wouldn’t leave? (Okay, I’ve clearly been watching too much “Criminal Minds.”) Exactly. You never know where you’ll be in your relationship come one, five or ten years from now.
  7. You’re the only thing I think about. Jeez, I wish that were the case. If my boyfriend was the only thing I ever thought about, my life would be a hell of a lot less stressful. Of course, he’s in many of my thoughts, but he’s definitely not the only thing I think about. I have deadlines, feeding the dogs, and cleaning the bathroom to think about, too. Honestly, if your partner is the only thing occupying your brain space, that’s not a sign of a healthy relationship.
  8. You’re perfect. This is another one that really irks me. How many times have you heard someone say “There’s no such things as perfect”? That’s because it’s the truth. Yes, maybe your significant other is “perfect” for YOU, but a perfect human being is nothing but a myth. We all have flaws and imperfections, but that’s what makes us who we are.
  9. I’m happy. (when you’re not) Never lie to yourself in a relationship about your happiness. If you aren’t happy, you need to change whatever is making you unhappy. If your relationship isn’t one you want to be in for years to come, staying with them is only wasting your time. There’s a quote by Chris Brogan that I live by: “Don’t settle. Don’t finish crappy books. If you don’t like the menu, leave the restaurant. If you’re not on the right path, get off it.” It’s important never to lie to yourself (or your S.O.) about your happiness, because then nothing will ever change.
  10. I love you. (when you’re not ready) Just because your partner told you they love you doesn’t mean you need to reciprocate. Yes, it may be awkward, but if you aren’t sure that you love the person you’re with, don’t lie to them and tell them you do. It takes time to fall in love with someone, so telling them just because they told you isn’t really fair. It’ll only make things messier in the long run.
Based in Massachusetts, you can find Kristen obsessing over all things beauty, Boston Terries and buffalo wings. As a makeup artist, photographer and writer, Kristen loves all things artsy. You can find her bylines on StyleCaster, Teen Vogue, The Gloss and The Bolde.