Knowing when to try to work through problems or when to walk away from a relationship is tough. You don’t want to give up on something that may be salvageable but you also don’t want to stay with someone who isn’t making you feel loved and secure. Unfortunately, if you’ve reached the point where you are actually asking yourself whether or not you should break up with him, your relationship has likely run its course. Here are a few other signs it’s over:
You don’t get excited about spending time with him anymore.
That spark from the beginning of the relationship fizzled out long ago. You don’t feel a rush when he texts you back. You don’t get butterflies when you kiss or brush shoulders. You don’t feel as strongly about him as you did at the start of the relationship when it was new and exciting. In fact, you’re starting to consider other options…
You think the grass is probably greener elsewhere.
It’s normal to miss being single sometimes and it’s also normal to start wondering if there’s someone better out there. However, if you catch yourself connecting with and feeling a spark with someone who isn’t your partner, then perhaps the grass really is greener on the other side. Wanting something and acting on it are two different things. If it’s not the kind of love that lights you up then you’re with the wrong person.
There’s a lack of interest about your interests.
Whenever you tell him exciting news about your job or something you’re equally passionate about, he doesn’t show much reaction. It’s almost like he doesn’t care about anything you have to say. Maybe he’s jealous or perhaps he just has no interest in what’s going on in your life. Either way, it’s not worth sticking around any longer.
You don’t understand each other.
The main reason for this is because you don’t communicate in the way that you should. You don’t talk about your problems, even though they’re tearing your relationship apart. In fact, you hardly talk about much of anything at all. Even when you argue, there’s no passion because let’s face it — you know that it’s just not worth fighting for anymore. Let it go.
You love him but you’re not IN love with him.
Being comfortable with your partner is one of the most important things you can get out of a relationship, but is there such thing as being TOO comfortable? Yep, there definitely is. You still spend time together and you still do things that other couples do, but most of the time, it almost feels platonic.
You’re the one putting in most of the work.
Despite the obvious signs telling you that you need to walk away, you still find yourself holding on. You give and give and give — but what are you getting back? Nothing. He doesn’t make an effort anymore and it’s stressing you out. Why should you put up with this BS?
More often that not, you feel neglected.
There are certain things that you shouldn’t have to ask your partner to do. You shouldn’t have to ask him to give you attention because he should go out of his way to make you feel special. You shouldn’t always be the one to make plans because he should be putting in more effort to spend time with you. You shouldn’t be wondering if he loves you because he should show it all the time. If he’s not making you feel like you’re an important person in his life, he doesn’t deserve you.
You feel nothing when he tells you that he loves you.
Hearing the words “I love you” is the most amazing feeling when it’s from the person who you love. It used to give you butterflies, but now it doesn’t make you feel anything. When you say it back, it’s with no feeling, as if you’re only saying the words because you feel like you have to. That’s a clear sign that your relationship is past the point of being saved.
The idea of dating someone new is more exciting than being with your partner.
You’ve hit a point where you feel bored in your relationship. It’s one thing to be bored of doing the same things every day, but if the thought of spending time with your guy makes you want to yawn, that’s a clear sign that you’re ready to move on.
The main reason why you’re still together is that the idea of dating someone new is terrifying.
Another sign you’ve grown way too comfortable for your own good. You’re not getting what you want out of the relationship, but you’re downright terrified of doing the whole dating thing and having to get close to someone else all over again. If that’s the only thing holding you back, it says a lot about where your relationship is heading.
In the end, you wouldn’t be questioning your relationship if you were truly happy.
When the idea of breaking up keeps running around your head, that’s a pretty clear sign that you want out of this. Despite being torn between staying and leaving, you know when something isn’t right, and this is one of those situations where you have to listen to your gut.
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