20 Signs You Dodged A Relationship Bullet

20 Signs You Dodged A Relationship Bullet ©iStock/Portra

When it comes to certain relationships, breaking up can be for the best. Sometimes, losing the guy in your life might be the equivalent of dodging a sling of bullets, Matrix-style. Even if it hurts right now, the fact is that you might have just spared yourself a lot of trouble down the road. If you noticed any of these signs from your last rendezvous, then consider yourself lucky:

  1. Everyone who hears how the situation went down is appalled. Here’s a good rule of thumb: If everyone you tell the details of the breakup to is horrified by the guy’s actions, then he was probably a horrible human being. Do you really want to be with someone whose behavior is so terrible that people are inherently shocked by it? Assuming you’re sane, probably not.
  2. He got violent, screamed at you, or insulted you. The minute you get out of his grip is the minute you begin dodging that bullet. Remember — there are people out there who spend almost all their lives wasting time trying to repair these monsters. That person does not have to be you, nor should it ever be.
  3. He tried to steal from you or use you for money. If you catch a guy trying to steal from you, it’s safe to say you should probably call the cops.
  4. After the two of you broke up, people seem relieved or happy for you. This is generally a sign that they knew that the guy wasn’t good for you, and that they might not have been able to figure out a way to broach the subject. If this is the case, you might want to believe their judgment.
  5. Your friends and family hated his guts and told you so. Admittedly, there may have been some prejudice behind it, but more often than not, it’s because they knew that he wasn’t good for you. If anything, take this as a lesson that you should listen to the people who care about you more often.
  6. Now that he’s out of the picture, you feel happier, more relaxed, and confident. This is a good indicator that he was poison in your life. Sometimes, it takes a while for you to actually feel this way. Once you get this vibe, it’s a good idea to listen to your gut and stay away from him.
  7. His current relationship is horrible, or you get the feeling that he’s mistreating his partner. After the breakup, it’s oh-so easy to feel like it was your fault even when it wasn’t. It’s so easy to think that you’re going to be alone, now that he’s dating someone else. Take a good look at his relationship. If you see that she seems as miserable as you were with him, it’s a good sign that he is the problem in the relationship and that you dodged a lifetime of misery by leaving.
  8. Drama has suddenly ceased. It’s stopped because your relationship with him stopped.
  9. He’s miserable. More often than not, if he’s miserable, it’s a sign that he realizes you were the best he could have had. When paired with other signs here, it’s an indication that you deserve better than him, anyway.
  10. Without him, you’re seeing major life improvements. Suddenly, your career is taking off. Your social life is now booming. Your family is even cool with you! If life is coming up roses, it might be fate’s way of saying that you lucked out.
  11. The person who you dumped is clearly unstable. Now, I’m not saying that Fatal Attraction is a bad movie, but if your ex is acting like Glenn Close, you may want to thank your lucky stars that you’ve left him. The more psychotic the person who ditched you is behaving, the more likely it is that you should be overall thankfully that you saw that side of them sooner than later.
  12. His friends still like you and hang out with you. This is a sign that they definitely prefer you over their original friend, and that says volumes about how they feel about their buddy.
  13. You begin to hear rumors about you or him. This is a sign that he’s likely crap talking you, or that he’s doing other sketchy things now that he’s ditched you. If none of the news is good, it’s pretty safe to say that losing him was a good thing for your life.
  14. He ghosted. Unless you yourself were abusive, this is a sign that you dodged a big bullet. A man who is this cowardly doesn’t deserve love, anyway.
  15. He’s gotten heavier, balded, etc. A good way to tell how bad of a bullet you dodged is to see how he’s looking after about a year post-breakup. If he’s really let himself go, it’s safe to say that you probably would have been unhappy with his butt.
  16. He recently got arrested. No one wants to be in a committed relationship with a jailbird, so consider his new arrest record a good sign of how lucky you are to not have him in your life. If he got arrested on assault or domestic violent charges, thank your lucky stars that he’s nowhere near you — or other women, for that matter.
  17. Your ex rejoined the dating pool rather quickly. This is generally a sign that he was either cheating on you throughout the relationship, or the type who’s in love with love, not a person.
  18. People are shocked that you dated him. If everyone around you is looking at you in shock when you say who your ex is, that’s a sign that you dodged a bullet. The reason why is obvious. If they’re shocked, that’s a  sign that you were way out of his league.
  19. He turned into a creep. When he starts posting stuff about how women don’t know what a Nice Guy (TM) he is, then it’s safe to say you dodged a bullet.
  20. His social media is a train wreck. If he’s making an ass out of himself, it’s safe to say you don’t need that embarrassment.
Ossiana Tepfenhart is a New Jersey based writer and editor with bylines in Mashed, Newsbreak, Good Men Project, YourTango, and many more. She’s also the author of a safe travel guide for LGBTQIA+ people available on Amazon.

She regularly writes on her popular Medium page and posts on TikTok and Instagram @ossianamakescontent.