Some guys want to be seen as The Man, the guy who can sweep a woman off her feet and who’s overly confident and tough AF. The only problem is that what they think is “manly” can often be ridiculous or frustrating as hell—and it certainly doesn’t make you want to sleep with them. Here are 14 “manly” things that need to die:
Having a big penis Men are so obsessed with their penises sometimes, it’s pathetic. A big penis doesn’t make a big man and it really doesn’t mean he’s going to be a porn star in the sack! Can’t guys understand that already? As for those d*ck pics, they’re Photoshopped and would’ve actually been sexier if they weren’t trying so hard to look gigantic.
Owning a fancy car You’re walking down the street when you hear a guy revving his car or driving fast with loud music playing. Ugh, so lame. What is it with guys and their fancy cars? It’s like they’re trying to use supposed status or loads of money to compensate for something. The funniest part is that no one gives a sh*t about how cool or manly they look in their sports cars.
Having a beard The more hair, the more manly a guy is? This is a total myth. I don’t get how having more hair on the face—or anywhere, for that matter—can make a guy seem masculine. Honestly, beards often just make a guy seem untidy or like they could do with a good face scrub.
Owning a gun Some guys actually post pictures of themselves holding shotguns on dating apps. WTF? Why does society equate weapons with masculinity? This isn’t Hollywood, and often those guys showing off about their guns really just look like they’ve got aggression issues. Stay away!
Eating meat When you’re the only vegetarian at a party, you’re bound to meet a meat-eating guy who wants to preach to you about how important protein is and how men are made to eat meat. F*ck off. It’s like there’s something less manly about eating broccoli or anything that wasn’t once running around. This crazy need to conquer nature is actually killing our planet. If these men were so manly, they’d be trying to save it instead of kill it.
Getting into bar fights It’s about the blood, bruises, and testosterone, huh? But honestly, to the women watching two drunk dudes get into a fight, it really looks like kindergarten all over again. A guy who’s truly manly will walk away instead of degrading himself, especially in front of his date who’s hiding behind her drink.
Showing off their biceps Muscles don’t make a man more manly, and not every woman actually finds bulging biceps attractive. If guys can’t live without going to the gym, the least they could do is not show off about it. So you lift, big deal?
Taking charge all the time It can be great to be with a guy who takes the lead and isn’t a lazy AF boyfriend, but he’s got to be fine with a woman taking over sometimes too. Otherwise, he’s not a man, he’s an insecure little boy who can’t deal with not being in control.
Being “mysterious” Yeah, the bad boys who look so mysterious have conned us all at some stage, but after a string of toxic boyfriends, you look at a guy trying to be all mysterious and brooding and all you see is an angry loser or someone who’s shady AF. It’s not manly to try to be secretive—it takes real balls to show what you feel.
Being sexist A man who tries to win arguments by saying “women can’t do that” or “we do this because we’re real men” need to GTFO. Seriously. Women don’t have time for this caveman bullsh*t.
Mansplaining This is one of the worst things that some men do! They’re so arrogant, they think they have to explain things to women, especially when the subject becomes something they consider to be “manly,” like cars or DIY. Ugh, so annoying. Someone needs to mansplain to men that they’re jerks when they mansplain.
Taking loads of selfies Those selfies men post on Facebook, either of themselves shirtless, sitting in their new cars or flexing in the gym, need to stop right now! If a guy thinks that this makes him more manly and attractive, he’s really clueless. He just looks desperate for attention.
Showing physical force A real man will help you move that heavy bookcase without stroking his own ego. Anything else is just an insecure guy trying so hard to be “The Man.” For example, he’ll flex his muscles, show you how easy it is for him to arm-wrestle a bigger dude, and make a big show of how he fixed his car. Insert eye roll. A real man is one who builds you up instead of trying to impress you with what he can build.
Being against the use of skincare products Remember the days when men would think that looking after their skin meant they weren’t manly enough? Sadly, some men still believe this so they’ll avoid anything that vaguely resembles a moisturizer out of fear of being too feminine. Some guys really need to get over themselves already—and it would help if they exfoliated sometimes so you don’t have to feel like you’re kissing sandpaper.
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