Picking apart everything a guy says, does, and texts you is something that girls do without even realizing. We’ve been trained to think he never actually means what he says, and there’s always some kind of hidden meaning that we have to dig out from underneath a pile of half-truths and blatant lies constructed for the purpose of getting in our pants. While that might sometimes be the case, the truth usually isn’t as complicated as we think it is. A lot of the time, he means exactly what he says. All you have to do is believe him.
- When he says he isn’t into you. If a guy is actually coming right out and saying he doesn’t like you like that, then he means it. Think about it — he’s giving up the chance at leading you on for however long just to have sex with you. He’s doing you a favor here, so don’t waste your time trying to change his mind.
- When he says he isn’t looking for anything serious. He’s being honest with you because he doesn’t want you to get the wrong idea about where things are going. He’s doing the right thing, so if you choose to continue being delusional about your relationship, that’s your fault, not his.
- When he says he needs some guy time. If he doesn’t invite you out with his friends one night because he’s having a “guy’s night” that is not an invitation for you to text him every hour, and then show up at the bar uninvited. He won’t be impressed. Trust me.
- When he says he’s over his ex-girlfriend. Being irrationally jealous when he’s done nothing to provoke it is only going to push him away. He’s only going to keep reassuring you for so long before he decides you aren’t worth the trouble. If he’s never done anything to deserve your mistrust, then cut him a little slack.
- When he says he can’t cook. OK, so maybe he’s never really tried, but if you don’t want to spend an evening eating his attempt at lasagna, just go with it when he suggests ordering in. Life’s too short to eat bad lasagna.
- When he says he does want something serious. No guy is going to pursue a serious relationship if he doesn’t really want to, so if that isn’t what you’re looking for, the right thing to do is let him down easy. He probably isn’t going to just “get the hint”, so be nice, and just tell him.
- When he says he loves you. Unless he’s one of those guys who says I love you so often that it ceases to have meaning, if he utters those three little words to you when he’s sober and you’re face to face, he means it. Even more so if you’re fully clothed, and he gives you a giant hug after. Not only did he say it, but, he doesn’t regret saying it, even for a second.
- When he says his career is his priority. A workaholic knows he’s a workaholic, and he’s aware that a lot of women need too much attention to deal with that. He’s learned that he has to be upfront about his priorities in order to avoid the fight later, so if he’s telling you he works a lot, you shouldn’t be surprised when he cancels on plans and isn’t very good at making time for you.
- When he says he doesn’t believe in marriage. People say this all the time and then change their minds, but if he’s saying it to you when he knows you do want to get married one day, it’s not a good sign. Sure, maybe he’s just not ready, but do you really want to stick around long enough to find out?
- When he says he doesn’t want kids. Another thing that people change their minds about all the time is having kids. Unfortunately, women who know they want to give birth to their own children have a biological clock to consider. If kids are a deal breaker, there’s no point in waiting for him to change his mind— you should just believe that he never will, and move on to someone who does.