This Is How You Know It’s True Love

True love doesn’t come along often. That’s why you should feel blessed if you’re lucky enough to find someone you can actually envision spending the rest of your life with. It’s true love, and if you’ve got it, you’ll know that your life is a little something like this:

  1. You spend more time orgasming than crying. He goes down on you whenever he gets the chance. He makes your body shake with pleasure more than it shakes with anger.
  2. You feel beautiful, even when you’re a mess. He jumps on top of you in the morning, before your makeup is on, and then again at night, after you’re a sweaty mess. He’s always in the mood to press his lips against you, and it makes you feel flawless.
  3. You eat whatever you want. You don’t have to choose salads over sundaes to impress him. He doesn’t care what size you are, because he loves your mind more than your body.
  4. You come home to a clean house. He hates washing the dishes, but he’ll still do it. If he knows you’ve had a rough day, he’ll want to make your life a little less stressful.
  5. You never doubt how he feels about you. The days of questioning his intentions are over. You already know that he’s not just using you for sex. He actually wants to call you his wife.
  6. You’ve lost the desire for other men. Sure, the new guy at your office is super hot, but you’d never even dream about making a move on him. You’re 100% committed to your partner.
  7. You feel comfortable in any situation. It doesn’t matter if the room is eerily silent or if someone just farted. Either way, you’ll still feel comfortable, because he’s the one person in the world who would never judge you.
  8. You love planning out your future with him. The thought of moving in together and popping out a child doesn’t scare you. It thrills you.
  9. You cuddle even more than you have sex. You love pressing your body against his, even if all of your clothes are still on. You just like being close to him.
  10. You know what he’s thinking. Mind reading is impossible, but he comes pretty close to pulling it off. You always know what he’s going to say before he says it, and he knows what you’re going to say, too.
  11. You can fight without fear of a breakup. You know that you can yell at him for the asinine way he folds his towels without worrying about him storming off. You two can withstand any fight.
  12. You wake up as happy as when you fall asleep. He’s not your entire world, but he definitely enhances your world. He’s made you feel things you’ve only read about in books.
  13. You’re always spoiled rotten. You don’t love him because of all of the gifts he buys you and massages he gives you, but you certainly appreciate them. It proves that he cares about you as much as he says he does.
  14. You feel safe. You can’t imagine anything horrible happening when he’s standing by your side. He’d never let anything bad happen to you.
  15. You’re terrified of losing him. You know you can survive without a boyfriend, but he’s more than just your boyfriend. He’s your best friend in the entire universe.
Holly is a science fiction and horror writer, who has recently been published by Flash Fiction Press, Infective Ink, and Popcorn Press. You can find more of her nonfiction articles on All Women Stalk, The Talko, and News Cult.