Rolling solo long-term was pretty great because I was free to do whatever I wanted 24/7 without taking anyone else’s thoughts, feelings, or schedule into account. Of course, it’s not a walk in the park all the time. Now that I’ve finally found love, I realize there are certain aspects of single life that I just won’t miss.
- I will never ever miss dating apps. Let’s be honest — dating apps can be truly heinous. Some of the people using them are disturbingly desperate, while others are heartless players who use them in a predatory manner to add more notches to their bedpost. Not everyone on there is a creep, but there were enough of them to make me quit online dating a long time ago and leave my future up to fate. Lucky for me, fate came through in my favor.
- I’m totally done being ghosted. Being ghosted is the worst. It’s rude, disrespectful and completely cowardly. The good news is that there are guys out there who have enough moral fiber to know how messed up that is and communicate honestly. Even if he’s not interested in me the way I’d like, having an honest conversation is so much better than someone just dropping off the face of the Earth with no warning.
- I hated choosing between a casual hookup or an excruciatingly long dry spell. Talk about having to choose between the lesser of two evils. When it had been so long that I barely remembered what actual sex was like, the casual hookup seemed like a better option… until after said hookup when the regret set in. Relationship sex is so much better, and anyone who disagrees isn’t in the right relationship.
- I (surprisingly) don’t miss having the bed all to myself. I thought that was one of the best things about being single, but love has a way of changing the self-centered perspective into more of a “we” mentality. When love found its way into my heart, it made me want to share my space because I’m sharing it with the right person.
- I’m done being the “last resort girl” at last call. The last resort girl is the one the obvious players pass up until the very last minute because she’s too short, too curvy, too pale, too brunette, whatever their BS ideal is. Then, when they’ve run out of options, they attempt to pick her up at last call. It’s completely disrespectful when a guy sends the message that you’re good enough to have sex with when everyone else turns him down, but, other than that, you’re worthless.
- I won’t miss fielding questions from my parents about when I’m going to meet someone. Oh wait, there will still be questions. Now they’ll just be bigger, scarier questions like, “When is the wedding and where are my grandkids?” I guess there’s no winning with parents sometimes.
- I’m totally done going to weddings alone. Being the single girl at a wedding can be great in some ways. After all, drinking and dancing are always fun. However, the theme of the day is love and that can affect anyone in attendance who hasn’t yet found love.
- I’ve said good riddance to planning the details of my future single life. When I was single for all those years, I had to make a lot of future plans that involved only myself in order to keep myself from worrying about the future. I planned to have a child using a sperm donor around age 35, buy my dream house and fill it up with cute dogs and writing projects. I can’t guarantee that the love I’ve found will be forever, but I have a really good feeling about it, so I’m scrapping the “me” plans for now and happily focusing on the “we.”