I Actually Love Being Single… Except In These 10 Moments

I’ve been single for what feels like forever and generally speaking, I love it. Sure, I get lonely sometimes and I wouldn’t mind finding the love of my life, but I’m not really in any rush — it’ll happen when it happens. In the meantime, I’m too busy enjoying rolling solo to really care… until I’m forced to confront these 10 things, that is:

  1. When there’s a work party. I get excited about holiday parties with my coworkers and always have a great time at them, but I can’t stand when people ask me who I’m going to bring. When I say I’m coming on my own, I get the obligatory, “Aww!” with that condescending look of pity and I feel crushed.That short three-letter word has the ability to make me feel really crappy about my single situation.
  2. When someone tries to set me up. Someone I know also knows someone who’s also single, so we’ll probably hit it off, right? Wrong. Just because two people are single doesn’t mean they belong together. Unless that person is truly someone I could click with — which is rarely the case, I should mention — it just makes me feel sad that I can’t find a great guy on my own.
  3. When I want to do ‘date’ things. Things like ice skating under the stars, going to the movies, or hitting up a Christmas market are all fine and well… if you do them with a date. Otherwise, the array of happy couples around me just makes me feel pathetic and depressed. I want to do cutesy things when I’m single, dammit.
  4. When people tell me online dating is the best way to find someone. I tried Tinder for a week and it just wasn’t for me. I don’t plan on jumping on any other dating site anytime soon, either, because the one guy I found on there turned out to be a huge bust. Just as I assumed, online dating is a more quantity over quality type of situation and it just made me realize how little there really is out there.
  5. When I’m horny AF. There’s only so much masturbation a woman can do before she needs to feel the weight of a man on top of her. And since I’m someone who doesn’t get off without the emotional attachment, casual sex just won’t do for me. When I’m single for as long as I have been, this pent up sexual frustration can get the best of me sometimes.
  6. When something breaks and I can’t fix it. There are certain things I need done around my house at times and when that happens, it’s more apparent than ever that I don’t have a good man in my life (or any man at all). Sure, I could call a guy to come and fix things, but at the same time, how much easier would it be if he was already here?
  7. When I have to tell someone about how life is going. It doesn’t matter that I have a great job, apartment, and plenty of other things going for me. When it comes time to tell them that I’m doing all these great things alone, that look of pity on their face says it all. Ugh.
  8. When I see people getting engaged that I assumed were forever alone. When that creepy guy I used to know in high school finds his match and displays it all over my feed, being single feels a little less awesome. I shouldn’t begrudge others happiness, but it just makes me wonder… if he can find love, why the hell can’t I?
  9. When I get invited to a wedding. Every time I get a wedding invitation and that plus-one rears its ugly head, it’s another single pie in the face. Weddings are the ultimate celebration of love, and being single at a wedding just sucks. Sure, I could probably hook up with one of the single guy guests, but it’s not the place I’m going to find my next big relationship. And then, of course, there’s those unwelcome “You’ll find someone!” conversations with Brittany’s cousin’s aunt’s best friend’s brother. No thanks.
  10. When I really just need a hug. When I’m down in the dumps to the point where I really just need someone to hold me (and actually give a crap while doing so), being single sucks. I want to have someone there to hold onto when something awful happens. Otherwise, I’m fine without that type of affection.
Angelica Bottaro has a bachelor’s degree in Psychology from Trent University and an Advanced Diploma in Journalism from Centennial College. She began her career as a freelance writer in 2014, racking up bylines in The Good Men Project, MakeWell, LymeTime, YouQueen, and more. She eventually shifted her focus and began writing about mental health, nutrition, and chronic disease for VeryWell Health.

You can follow her on Facebook or check out her website at AngelicaBottaro.ca. She also posts on Instagram @a.ct._b and Twitter @angiiebee.