You know the girl — the one who can barely function if she knows her boyfriend is out with his friends without her; the one who’s suspicious of every other girl who so much as looks at her boyfriend the wrong way; the one who gets too attached too soon and has no intention of pretending otherwise. We’ve all been that girl to some extent — some of us just try harder to suppress it than others. The one thing we all have in common, though, is we weren’t born this way — a guy (or a few of them) made us this way.
- Being cheated on is traumatizing. Especially if you were completely blindsided when you thought your relationship was pretty solid. When your trust has been violated that blatantly by someone you cared about, it’s not easy to get to a point where you’re willing to trust someone new. It might not be fair to take your baggage out on a new guy, but it happens. You’re only human.
- No girl likes feeling stupid. Who hasn’t heard the saying ‘fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me’? Everyone girl has been played by a guy at some point, and the experience usually teaches her the red flags she should be on high alert for next time. Except, nothing is black and white, so there’s bound to be a false positive every once in awhile. Still, no girl wants to make the same mistake twice, so if acting a little ‘crazy’ will prevent that from happening, then crazy it is.
- Guys can be extremely confusing sometimes. Men and women often interpret the exact same events in opposite ways. It’s just a fact. He might have no idea he’s making you crazy by not texting the day after sleeping with you for the first time, but in your mind he’s blowing you off and you need to react accordingly. You’ve been ghosted before and you aren’t going to fade off without a fight this time.
- Mind games can cause real damage. Constantly dealing with guys who say one thing and do another is eventually going to take its toll. No one can really blame you for being cautious (or straight up suspicious) when you’ve been burned so many times in the past. Your ‘crazy’ behavior is just another facet of self preservation.
- You’re tired of acting like the “cool girl.” Being up for anything, never getting upset, and constantly being receptive to a guy’s every whim may be easy in the beginning, but it’s definitely not realistic in the long run. Suppressing your bitchy side gets exhausting after awhile, and frankly, it’s not worth it. To the guys who expect women to be agreeable 24/7, of course anything less will seem “crazy”– but it’s actually just real.
- Emotions aren’t rational. A visceral reaction is never going to be thought through and 100% logical. So, yes, sometimes you lose it and act a little bit crazy, but it’s generally because a guy did something to provoke you. You aren’t just going to fly off the handle for absolutely no reason whatsoever.
- Guys call perfectly normal behavior “crazy.” How often have you heard a guy refer to his ex-girlfriend as “crazy”? But when he actually describes her behavior, it’s essentially nothing more than a few too many texts and the fact that she got pissed when he tried to ghost her. A lot of the time he’s slapping her with the crazy label just to make himself look like the innocent one when it reality, his side of the story is missing a couple key facts.
- “Crazy” is subjective. ‘Crazy’ to one guy might be endearing to another. Of course, there are always extremes that can really only be interpreted in one way, but there’s also a lot of grey area when it comes to how to go about the whole dating thing. A girl might think being persistent will get her what she wants because, well, it worked in the past. Guys are just as guilty of this, too.
- Everyone’s guilty of overcompensating once in awhile. OK, yes, there are times you might go overboard. But it’s probably because you really likes a guy and want to make the right impression. You tried being cool, but that didn’t work. So, you’d rather put yourself out there and know you tried than do nothing and regret it later. If you end up with the crazy label– at least you’ll learn what not to do next time.