Do They Regret Leaving Me? 10 Signs They Definitely Do

Do They Regret Leaving Me? 10 Signs They Definitely Do

When a relationship comes to an end, it’s natural to wonder if the other person has any regrets about the decision to leave. It’s a question that can linger in your mind, especially during moments of reflection. While there’s no surefire way to read someone’s mind, there are often clear signs that can suggest someone is experiencing regret over a breakup. Here are 11 indicators that your ex might be having second thoughts about their choice to move on and they regret leaving you.

1. They Keep Finding Reasons to Communicate.

If your ex is getting in touch for small things that they could easily figure out without your help, it might mean something. They send you messages or call you for updates about things that aren’t really important, like how to make a dish they’ve made before or questions about a TV show you used to watch together. It’s as if they’re looking for any excuse to talk to you. This might happen often, and the conversations could go beyond the initial question they had, leading to more personal topics. This type of behavior is usually a sign they miss having you around and regret the distance the breakup has created.

2. They’re Nostalgic About the Past.

Nostalgia is a powerful emotion, and if your ex is constantly bringing up the past, it’s probably not just casual conversation. They talk about the trips you took together, the concerts you attended, and the lazy Sundays you enjoyed. It’s like they’re trying to relive those memories and perhaps remind you of them too. They might even bring up small, seemingly insignificant moments that meant a lot to them. This selective memory, focusing on the good times and glossing over whatever led to the breakup, is often a hint that they might be second-guessing their decision to leave.

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4. They’re Curious About Your Dating Life.

When your ex asks about who you’re seeing or what you’ve been up to on the dating scene, it’s not just idle curiosity. They might do it under the guise of just “catching up,” but what they’re really doing is checking to see if there’s a new person in your life. This kind of interest in your romantic status post-breakup is usually not about being a supportive friend. It’s more likely they’re wondering if you’ve moved on and if they still have a chance, which can indicate they’re regretting the breakup.

5. They’ve Made Significant Changes Since the Breakup.

People often change after a breakup, but if your ex is making changes that you always wanted to see while you were together, it could mean more. For example, if you always talked about how you wished they were more punctual and suddenly they’re never late, or you wished they would take up a hobby and now they have, they might be trying to show they can change. These kinds of transformations can be their way of demonstrating they’re a different person now, possibly in hopes of getting back together.

6. They Admit the Breakup Was a Mistake.

When an ex openly confesses that breaking up was a wrong move, it’s a blatant sign they’re experiencing regret. They might tell you this directly during a late-night call or a heartfelt message. Sometimes, they won’t say it to you face-to-face but will confess to mutual friends, hoping the message gets back to you. This admission usually comes after a lot of thought and is often a sign that they’re not only missing you but also sincerely wish they could turn back time and make a different choice.

7. They’re Trying to Make You Jealous.

If your ex seems to be parading their new life or new partner around, especially in ways that they know will get back to you, it’s likely not just for their own satisfaction. They could be posting a lot on social media, or making sure to tell mutual friends about the “amazing” dates they’re going on. It might feel like they’re performing a show where they’re the star – and they want to make sure you’re in the audience. Often, this is done to provoke a reaction from you, and it hints at their underlying feelings of regret and desire to still be noticed by you.

8. They’re Apologetic About How Things Ended.

When someone keeps saying sorry for how they acted in a relationship, especially for things that led to its end, it’s a good indication they have regrets. Your ex might send messages apologizing for past mistakes or even for the act of breaking up itself. They might do this repeatedly, emphasizing their remorse. It’s like they’re trying to clear the slate or perhaps open up a dialogue about reconciliation. It shows they’ve been reflecting on their actions and the breakup, and they’re not at peace with how things turned out.

9. They Keep the Same Routines.

If your ex is still visiting your favorite coffee shop, walking their dog in the same park where you used to go together, or hanging out at the same spots you frequented as a couple, it could be more than just coincidence. They’re maintaining these routines that you once shared, which could be a comfort thing, but it can also signal they’re not ready to fully let go of the life they had with you. This lingering in shared spaces suggests they might be hoping to bump into you or keep some semblance of the relationship alive.

10. They Haven’t Returned Your Things.

Keeping your belongings might seem like a minor thing, but it can be quite telling. If your ex still has clothes, books, or other items of yours and makes excuses when you try to get them back, it could be because those things remind them of you. They might be holding onto your items as a way of holding onto the past. It’s like they can’t quite close the chapter, and having your stuff around might give them a sense of connection to you.

11. They Try to Stay Close to Your Friends and Family.

If your ex is making an effort to stay in touch with your friends and family after the breakup, this is often a sign they’re looking to remain connected to you by proxy. They could be commenting on your family’s social media posts, asking about your relatives, or even showing up at events where they know you or your friends will be. This could be because these people remind them of you, or it could be a way to keep tabs on how you’re doing without directly asking you. Their presence in these circles hints at a reluctance to fully exit your life and potentially a hope to re-enter it.

Gail is Bolde's social media and partnership manager, as well as an all-around behind-the-scenes renaissance woman. She worked for more than 25 years in her city's local government before making the switch to women's lifestyle and relationship sites, initially at HelloGiggles before making the switch to Bolde.