Some people find it difficult to articulate their intentions in a relationship, but if he isn’t telling you how he feels in words, his actions are probably doing all the talking you need. Here are a few signs he’s serious about your relationship:
- He texts you just to check in. Getting your crush to text you back can be like pulling teeth, so when they make the effort to initiate contact on their own, you can be sure that it’s a statement. This is especially true when all they’re texting to say is “How are you?” A guy who goes out of his way just to see how you’re doing is showing you that he genuinely cares about you and is thinking about you on a regular basis. This is one of the first signs that he’s falling for you in a big way.
- He’s talked to you about his insecurities. Most people don’t share the vulnerable parts of themselves unless they’re serious about the person they’re telling them to. If he’s revealing things about himself that are painful and personal, or even just sweet and embarrassing, he’s clearly putting himself on the line because he thinks your relationship is solid and on a good trajectory. When he’s sharing parts of himself with you, he’s establishing the intimacy necessary for a long-lasting and meaningful relationship.
- He refers to you as his “girlfriend.” Terminology is difficult in dating, especially these days when it isn’t uncommon for one person to be pursuing several different relationships at one time. People are afraid of committing to just one person because of how many options there are, so when someone is serious enough about a relationship to call you their girlfriend, it’s clear his intentions are for something deeper.
- He talks about the future. A sure sign that a guy isn’t taking you or the relationship seriously is when he talks about “my” future instead of “our” future. If it’s early on in your relationship, this may not be a huge deal, but if you’re four months in and he’s still talking about where he’s thinking about moving and what he plans on doing with his life without any mention of your role in it, it’s time to accept that he isn’t thinking of you as a long-term partner.
- He’s introduced you to his friends. Meeting someone’s friends for the first time can be really terrifying, but remember that if you’ve gotten to the point where he’s ready to introduce you to the people closest to him, you’ve already cleared the hurdle. If he’s serious enough to show you off to his friends, he’s clearly decided that you’re the one he wants to invest in.
- His parents know you by name. Just because you haven’t met his parents doesn’t mean he isn’t serious. They might live across the state or in a completely different time zone or country. The real indication of how serious he is about you is whether or not they know you by name. If they do, it means he’s been talking about you to them, and no one brings up the specifics of the person they’re dating to their parents unless they’re comfortable being asked about you every time they call.
- He’s protective of you. When you’re upset about something, he’s upset about it; when you’re angry with someone, he’s angry with them too. Your battles are his battles, not because he has to be a part of every aspect of your life, but because he cares about you enough to feel your frustrations and be your support regardless of how insignificant the issue is.
- He makes sure to resolve conflicts. Effort is the single most telling sign that someone is serious about you, and nowhere is effort more apparent or important than during arguments. When you’re angry, it’s so easy to just throw up your hands and slam the door as you leave. It’s satisfying and dramatic, and it’s so much more fun than sitting down and hashing things out like grown-ups. If he’s refusing to take the easy way out during arguments and is making an effort to work through things, he is showing you that he’s committed to making the relationship work.
- He makes his schedule with you in mind. You shouldn’t be getting to see him only when he has nothing else going on. He should be making time to see you and communicating with you on a daily basis about it. You should never feel like a convenience or a hassle. He should make it clear that every moment spent with you is a privilege and something he’ll go out of his way to make happen.
- He cares about the little things. When you’ve had a stressful day at work, he won’t just say he’s sorry and move on to other topics, he’ll dig deeper until you’ve told him all the trivial things that happened that day that contributed to your low mood. He wants to know the details because whatever matters to you, matters to him. Any guy who cares that much about the parts of your life that seemingly have nothing to do with him is serious about wanting to be with you.