The relationship ended bitterly and now your ex is making your life a nightmare online. Dealing with a social media troll can be upsetting but there are ways to shut him down. Here are 11 steps you can take if you’re being trolled by your ex.
- Ignore it. One of the best ways to deal with a bully (which is basically what a troll is) is to ignore him. That’s how you shut him down. Instead of letting his comment on your post rile you up, see the bigger picture. He doesn’t matter at all. You don’t need to engage with him anymore. You’re done.
- Be clear with him. If he won’t take the hint, ignoring him might not work. He wants to get your attention but he’s being damn childish about it. Tell him straight up that you don’t want to talk to him anymore. Sometimes this is all people need to back away. It might also be a good idea to do so in private, so you don’t air dirty laundry on your Facebook timeline. Just saying.
- Block him. When the above fails, block his ass. He had it coming. Blocking is an awesome feature that can make you feel so much better. It’s like instantly erasing someone from your life.
- Take it offline. Sometimes the online world can feel claustrophobic and like the only one that matters. When you’re hurt on there by a troll, it can really mess with your head. That’s why it’s good to remember that you have a whole life outside of the virtual world. Spend time with those who love you and will remind you that you don’t need to spend another second thinking about your loser ex that you’re clearly so much better off without.
- Change your privacy settings. Still feeling the high from blocking your ex on Facebook? Enjoy it, but then go play around with your privacy settings a bit. No, seriously, go now. Change how public your profiles are. This is important because you don’t want to block your trolling ex only for him to be able to view your profiles from other social media accounts.
- Don’t play to his emotional needs. When a guy trolls you, he’s probably doing it to get an emotional reaction out of you. Why give him what he craves? Avoid letting him see you angry or frustrated. He thrives on that, the a-hole. Keep your cool and come out on top. Show the world that he’s actually the jerk in this situation.
- Be happy—it’s the best revenge. Don’t let a troll who’s watching you online make you feel you shouldn’t post as much about your life. Happiness is the best revenge, so show him just how happy you are without him. It might make him mad, which will make him post even angrier or bitter things, but hey, he’s the loser. The worst thing you can do is write negative posts that hint at trouble with an ex. He probably won’t get the hint anyway. If you’re going to tell him something, do it firmly and directly.
- Log out. While you might be tempted to delete your social media accounts, that’s not necessarily the best way to deal with an ex who’s trolling you. Why erase your beautiful Instagram account because of some jackass? Besides, you don’t want to react out of fear. He’ll love it. That said, it might be a good idea to take some time away from social media for a while, just to give yourself a break from the stress.
- Share it. Sometimes laughter really is the best way to deal—either that or expose the troll for the loser he is. If your ex is always sending you negative messages, take a snapshot and share them with your friends and followers. Show the world what a loser he is. This might seem petty, but it’ll make you feel empowered because you’ve got people backing you up. Besides, once the troll is identified and exposed, he’ll hopefully bugger off. Granted, he might not be using his actual account to troll you, but it’s still him—and now he knows you’re not just going to sit by and let him be a jerk to you.
- Avoid getting into a debate. You might hope to turn the troll around, but don’t waste your time. In a blog about confessions of a former troll, the advice is clear: “I have never seen a troll lay down his or her arms and say, ‘You know what, you’re right. I was so wrong.'” Ouch. So don’t waste your energy and data on this guy.
- Don’t delete your posts. So you posted something awesome about your life on social media only to have your trolling ex comment with something negative. Your knee-jerk reaction might be to delete it and act like the post never happened. But don’t. Why miss out on the positive comments just because of one rotten apple? Besides, seeing as though trolls feed on attention, by seeing that you’ve been so hurt by the comment that you’ve deleted your post, he’s indirectly getting his reward. Screw that.