How To Choose Between Two Guys And Make The Right Decision

How To Choose Between Two Guys And Make The Right Decision

Struggling to choose between two great guys? While there’s no one way to make sure you’re making the right decision, you can do a little reflection and consider some important things that should lead you down the right path. Here are some things to think about before committing to one or the other.

1. Figure Out What Really Rocks Your Relationship Boat.

When you’re trying to choose between two guys, you have to do a bit of soul-searching. What are the must-haves in your dream partner? Is it all about those belly laughs, deep heart-to-hearts, or someone who’s a wizard at gaming? This is your chance to think about what really matters to you. Is it important that he respects your love for K-pop or your ambition to be a CEO by the time you’re 35? Maybe you’re looking for a guy who’s as passionate about climate change as you are. Note down those non-negotiables.

2. Do a Deep-Dive into Your Feelings for Each Guy.

Now, let’s dive into those feels. Is Guy #1 giving you major heart eyes because he looks like a TikTok star, or is there a deeper connection? Maybe he remembers your fave ice cream flavor or listens to you vent about work. And what about Guy #2? Does he make your heart skip a beat when he smiles or when he talks passionately about his weird hobbies? This isn’t about picking the cutest guy; it’s about who makes you feel like you’re in a Taylor Swift song.

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4. Future-Check: Which Guy is #Goals?

Imagine your life in fast-forward. Who’s riding shotgun in your road trip adventures or binge-watching Netflix series with you? Think about the guy who’s not just there for the good times but also when you’re stressing over exams or having family drama. If one of them is popping into your mind when you think about these scenarios, that’s a huge clue about who might be Mr. Right.

5. Gather Your BFFs for Some Real Talk.

Time to bring in the experts – your BFFs. They’ve been there through your crushes on celebs, your awkward phase, and your obsession with that boy band. They’ll give it to you straight – maybe they’ve noticed that Guy #1 always makes you laugh, or that Guy #2 has seen you at your worst but sticks around. But hey, while their opinions are gold, remember this is your love story, not theirs. Your heart gets the final say!

6. Consider the red flags.

Let’s talk deal-breakers. If one of the guys is acting like a ghost (and not the cute, Casper kind), always leaving you on read, or doesn’t cheer on your dreams, that’s not cool. You want a guy who’s your biggest fan, not someone who makes you feel like you’re competing for his attention. Pay attention to how they treat you – are they kind, respectful, and supportive? Those are the green flags you want to see.

7. What’s the Ripple Effect of Your Choice?

Decisions in love are like throwing a pebble in a pond – they create ripples. Think about how your choice will affect not just you but also the two guys and your friends. Are you ready to potentially lose a friend or have some awkward group hangouts? Whatever you do, don’t just vanish. Be honest and gentle – no one likes to be left wondering what they did wrong.

8. Don’t Rush – This Ain’t a TikTok Challenge.

No need to beat the buzzer here. Love isn’t a speedrun; it’s more like a scavenger hunt. Take your time to figure out your feelings. Chat with your pet (they’re great listeners), journal your thoughts, or make a playlist that captures your mood. Sometimes, the heart needs a little extra time to figure things out, and that’s totally okay.

9. Trust Those Tummy Butterflies (or Lack Thereof).

Ever feel those butterflies in your stomach when you’re around one of the guys? Or maybe there’s one guy who, no matter how awesome he is, just doesn’t give you that fluttery feeling. Listen to that. Sometimes your body picks up on things before your brain does. Trust those vibes; they’re usually onto something.

10. Brace Yourself for the Feels Post-Decision.

Get ready for a rollercoaster of emotions. You might feel relieved, sad, or even a bit guilty. That’s normal. Be gentle with yourself and the guy you’re not choosing. Remember, it’s all about being honest but kind. No one deserves to be left in the dark, and clear communication is key. It’s tough, but it’s part of growing up and getting to know what you want in relationships.

11. Own Your Choice and Strut Forward.

Decision made? Awesome! Now, own it. There might be moments of doubt, but trust that you did your best. Remember why you chose the guy you did. Embrace this new chapter in your life, whether it’s hand-in-hand with your chosen guy or solo, rocking the single life. You’ve got this!

12. Explore How Each Guy Fits into Your World.

Think about how each guy meshes with the other important parts of your life. Does one of them get along super well with your friends, or maybe even your little brother thinks he’s cool? It’s not just about how he makes you feel, but also about how he fits into your broader world. Does he support your hobbies, respect your family time, and get your quirky sense of humor? A guy who gels with your world is like finding that perfect puzzle piece.

13. Consider How They Handle Conflict.

Remember that time you disagreed about something? How did each guy handle it? Was he all about understanding your point of view, or did it turn into a major drama? How you both handle disagreements says a lot about how things will go when the going gets tough. Look for the guy who’s willing to work through issues, not the one who shuts down or blows up.

14. Reflect on Your Personal Growth with Each Guy.

Which guy makes you feel like the best version of yourself? Does one encourage you to try new things or challenge you to grow in ways you never expected? Sometimes, the right person for us isn’t just about fun and games, but about who helps us evolve. Think about who inspires you to chase your dreams, believes in your potential, and cheers you on every step of the way.

Piper Ryan is a NYC-based writer and matchmaker who works to bring millennials who are sick of dating apps and the bar scene together in an organic and efficient way. To date, she's paired up more than 120 couples, many of whom have gone on to get married. Her work has been highlighted in The New York Times, Time Out New York, The Cut, and many more.

In addition to runnnig her own business, Piper is passionate about charity work, advocating for vulnerable women and children in her local area and across the country. She is currently working on her first book, a non-fiction collection of stories focusing on female empowerment.
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