How To Make Sure You’re The Only One He Wants

You want to be his one and only, but don’t leave it up to chance! While he’s spending time with you, he’s sussing out if he should be with you or not. Your actions speak a thousand words, so consider these tips to help you stay in his mind and heart.

  1. Be your own person. You won’t stay in his mind by being what you think he wants you to be. He likes sports so you like sports? No. Be who you are and don’t be afraid to be “too much.” The right guy will see how memorable and unique you are, and will choose you based on that.
  2. Show him you want him. If he’s made it clear he likes you, now’s not the time to play games with the guy. Show him you want him, but don’t be needy! The last thing he needs is a baby to look after. He’s looking for an independent woman who wants to be in love but doesn’t depend on it like its oxygen.
  3. Step out on a clean slate. Yes, you were hurt in the past. Yes, you have trust issues that could fill a home. But you know what? If you let your emotional baggage play “tag along,” he’ll only think you’re one word: drama. Be sure that you’re ready to leave the past behind so you can start fresh with someone who’s worthy of your heart, then show him you’re 100 percent in it.
  4. Start building something¬†real. Okay, so he thinks you’re super-sexy and you know he wants to get to know you a bit better. But, that’s not what your ultimate goal should be with this guy. Think ahead! If you want to be his one and only, you can’t solely focus on your physical connection ’cause that will fade. Focus on building a stronger connection with him by reaching out and trying to figure out more about him than what he looks like without a shirt on.
  5. Make your time together fun. Now, I’m not suggesting that you try to slap on a happy face before you see him so that he never sees you unhappy. That’s just unrealistic and fake – he doesn’t want to date a robot. What I mean is that it’s always a good thing to put effort into planning your dates so that they’re meaningful, memorable, and filled with good energy. You want him to remember you as the person who always made him smile because that’s the woman he’ll keep going back to.
  6. Stand your ground. Dating’s not just about the good times. You also have to show him that you stand your ground on issues that are important to you. Now’s not the time to back down or drop and roll onto a carpet so he can walk all over you. He won’t respect that (would you?). The right guy will want a woman who isn’t afraid to be herself, speak her mind, and show him where the boundaries are.
  7. Support his struggle. If you can’t be there when he’s working his way up, he might not think you deserve to be there with him when he finally pops the champagne because he’s achieved success. Support him through the hard times, but make sure he does the same for you.
  8. Let him trust you. When he shares important info with you, cherish it. Show him that he can trust you by not blabbing to your girlfriends later. When he becomes emotional, don’t rub his hair like he’s a pet – respect the inner workings of his soul and show him that you handle his feelings with care and respect. This will show him that he can reach deeper levels with you, and that’s what he wants in a woman he chooses for the long haul.
  9. Be nice to those he loves. Okay, so maybe you think his BFF is a bit of a loser or you don’t really see yourself getting along with his brother. It doesn’t matter. They matter to him so they matter. Show them respect and he’ll see you as a mature, loving woman who he’d love to take home.
  10. Be on your own path. Never let him think that you’re sitting around waiting for him to choose you. Vomit. Ultimately, you want to be on your own path because you’re building your own empire and making things happen for yourself. As a nice bonus, this has the effect of making him step up and take notice. He’ll admire your hustle and want to be a part of your life. He’ll see you as an equal with whom he can build a stunning future.


Giulia Simolo is a writer from Johannesburg, South Africa with a degree in English Language and Literature. She has been working as a journalist for more than a decade, writing for sites including AskMen, Native Interiors, and Live Eco. You can find out more about her on Facebook and LinkedIn, or follow her on Twitter @GiuliaSimolo.