I’ve been called every name in the book when it comes to my sexual proclivities. I’m not a slut, whore, hooker, or anything of the sort but I do love casual sex and I’m not ashamed of it. I’m a little bit promiscuous and I like it that way. What’s the problem?
- The double standard is ridiculous. You know that guy that called you a slut? Yeah, the same guy who’s hooked up with more people than you have in your contact list. His friends slap him on the back for his conquests but turn around and make you feel like you did something dirty and wrong. News flash: you didn’t and neither did I. I refuse to subscribe to some outdated BS ideas about how much sex I can have, with whom, and when. I do what I damn well please.
- Other people’s opinions are irrelevant. I’m not a fan of cliches, but there’s one that applies here. Opinions are like a-holes: everybody has one and they all stink. The moment you realize your own approval and happiness are the only things that matter is the moment things become infinitely better for you. That was certainly the case for me. While I typically lean towards hooking up with the hot guys I meet, if I’m cool with it and he’s cool with it, that’s ALL that matters. People will talk regardless, so I may as well have fun.
- Life is way too short to not enjoy it fully. Not every guy I meet in a bar is “The One” but he doesn’t have to be. He just has to be the one for that night, right? This life has a timer on it. There are only so many cute guys in crowded bars to take home at the end of the night. It would be tragic to let one slip through your fingers.
- My real friends want me to be happy and have fun. My real friends will never judge me for hooking up with anyone. They want me to get it just as much as I want to do so. Anybody that demeans me for who I sleep with (or don’t) isn’t my real friend. It’s their problem, not mine.
- I’ll never have a shortage of great stories. Sure, I can play it safe to avoid judgment from people… or I can have an arsenal of fun and flirty stories to look back on fondly. Maybe it was sweaty, awkward, and embarrassing. Maybe I made an enormous fool of myself. Maybe I left my underwear behind as I made my escape. Maybe it was mind-blowing in every conceivable way. Either way, I’ll never have the memories if you don’t try.
- I’ll never know what works and what doesn’t if I don’t experiment. The casual one-night stand thing might not be for everybody and that’s totally cool. I’m in no way advocating for a certain lifestyle if someone’s totally opposed to it. However, if you don’t get out there and get it wrong a few times, you’re more likely to never get it right. Not every guy will be all fireworks, but at least I have a better chance of figuring out how to get those fireworks if I try out several different options.
- I’m the captain of my own ship. It’s so easy to get caught up in the slut-shaming that’s all too prevalent in our society. However, at the end of the day, only I can make myself feel the “shame” part. I’ve lost many a sleepless night trying to dissect every terrible name I’ve been called and every so-called terrible thing I’ve done and gotten nowhere. I only end up more exhausted. I prefer to save myself the torture and the torment and tune it all out.
- It’s a whole lot of fun. It’s really as simple as that. I’m not saying every night out needs to end with me hooking up with a guy because that’s not the case. But on the nights I do end up with someone, it’s always just a little more fun. Okay, a lot more. It’s enjoyable to hook up with cute guys and I won’t apologize for that. Sorry not sorry.
- It has nothing to do with self-respect or attention-seeking. I can respect myself and still freely sleep around. The two are not mutually exclusive. Who I sleep with or how many people I sleep with is in no way related to how much respect I have for myself, nor is it some kind of attention-seeking ploy. I respect myself enough to know that my self-worth and value doesn’t come from who I do or don’t sleep with and therefore shouldn’t base my own human decency on those ideas.
- It’s all about reclaiming the word slut. One of the main reasons both men and women toss around the word “slut” is to retain power over an individual. It’s a mechanism used to decrease self-worth and make women feel as though we’re dirty or abnormal for exhibiting the same behaviors as our male counterparts. There’s nothing wrong with wanting to sleep around or not wanting to do so. I’m a little bit of a slut and I’m totally okay with that—and you should be too.