I’m Tired Of Guys Who Are All Talk And No Action, Aren’t You?

There’s nothing hotter than sexual tension, but why are there so many guys who love to build it up with flirty conversation and suggestive comments only to flake on you at the last minute? I’m tired of playing games with someone who isn’t even sure he wants to hook up and I’m also so confused. If he doesn’t want anything physical to happen between us, then what does he want exactly?

  1. I never thought that there are so many time-wasters out there. You’d think that a guy you just met would want to meet you ASAP to see if you’re compatible in real life, right? Wrong. So many guys today take their sweet time to solidify plans as if they want to make sure you tick all the right boxes, but then they aren’t looking for anything serious. So confusing!
  2. I just don’t have the energy for it. Late-night texting back and forth can be super romantic… as long as it leads to an actual date. What’s more, I personally wouldn’t stay up until 3 a.m. talking to someone I’m never planning to meet in person. I’d rather go out with him to find out what his deal is than spend weeks thinking he’s something special when he isn’t. I’m amazed at how certain people are happy to spend so much time procrastinating instead of just having a quick drink together, and then move on with their lives if they don’t get along.
  3. It just feels like I’m wasting my life. A guy who’s all talk doesn’t feel like something real-romantically speaking. I want a real date, not to hang out with my phone and a glass of wine every night. I need actual human interaction and the fact that he doesn’t need the same is kinda fishy.
  4. It’s even more frustrating every time I’m in the mood for something casual.  I’m not looking for Mr. Right every single day. Quite often, I just want to hook up with someone. Then I have to navigate through all the ambiguous messages, passive-aggressive silences, and confusing emojis. It’s too much work for someone who just wants a fun night out, don’t you think?
  5. No, it’s not up to me to make him make a move. Relationships today are more equal than ever, but that doesn’t mean the ball is in my court indefinitely. I wouldn’t be wasting hours of my day talking to him and making myself available to go out if I wasn’t interested.  If he were genuinely interested in me too, he would make plans to meet. Actions speak louder than words.
  6. Flirty conversation is sexy only up to a point. Sharing sexual chemistry with someone is extremely fun, but after a certain point, it gets really awkward if it doesn’t lead to actual intimacy. No matter how hot he is, after a few weeks of ambiguous texts, I’m bored and the chemistry fizzles out.
  7. Too much talking is a red flag anyway. I’m not sure about you, but in my case, all the guys I’ve gone out with who were too good with words were not so great in bed. The problem was that they were too intellectual to just live in the moment. When I needed them to follow through on promises, they would just keep talking and totally put me off the mood.
  8. I just need someone who does the things he promises. When he tells me something like, “You’re so gorgeous, I want to get to know you better,” I kinda take it seriously. Why shouldn’t I?  There are plenty more fish in the sea for anyone to bother with this crap anymore. Maybe I’m just too gullible, but the thought that he just wants to play games like some online scammer and isn’t planning to meet me in person is just terrifying.
  9. I’m terrified that the only alternative to the guy that is all talk is the guy who doesn’t talk at all. Maybe it’s just my bad luck, but I always seem to attract two types of men: the ones who over-communicate and the ones who have zero communication skills. Ideally, I’d like something in between. I need someone who is sincere and who follows up on his promises. Why is this so hard? If I can treat others with respect, so can he.
  10. I’m done trying to find excuses for guys’ behavior. Texting me back and forth all night and then disappearing for days or weeks without a single explanation? I am so over making up excuses to justify this nonsensical behavior. If he isn’t emotionally or physically available one or two weeks after we first meet, I’m deleting his number and I’m moving on with my life. Moreover, in the future, I’m not replying to any of his messages, which no doubt will show up when I’ve already moved on.










Chrisa is a freelance travel and lifestyle journalist who is obsessed with urban life, big cities, and untold stories.