Is Your Boyfriend Cheating? Signs Of Infidelity To Be Aware Of

Some affairs are easy to spot, while others are hidden so well that they carry on for years without anyone noticing. Regardless of the situation, there are usually at least a few signs that your boyfriend is cheating on you. Here are the main ones to look out for.

  1. He’s changed his appearance. People who are cheating will often change how they look in order to be more attractive to the person they’re seeing on the side. It’s typical for cheaters to lose weight, bulk up, or otherwise start taking care of themselves because they’re trying to impress a new love interest. Not that your boyfriend hitting the gym means that he’s definitely cheating, but this is a sign to look out for when it appears in conjunction with other signs.
  2. He’s picking more fights. Cheaters might start to lose respect for their partners. They also might be holding in unreleased anger and tension that they haven’t worked out with their significant others yet. This can lead to them picking more fights at home. If your boyfriend seems to be looking for reasons to fight with you, he may be cheating on you and using fake problems to feel better about it.
  3. He suddenly has New hobbies. A cheating boyfriend might suddenly adopt new hobbies and interests. Usually, these will match those of the person he’s cheating with. But his new interests might also indicate a change in his overall personality or a change in his happiness levels as a result of being unfaithful.
  4. He’s started being more critical of you. Sometimes, cheaters become more critical of their partners. Again, this comes down to a breakdown of the respect and compassion within the relationship. He might start picking on you and judging you, whereas before, he was tolerant and patient with you. A cheating boyfriend will begin nitpicking little things because they now stand out in comparison to his side piece.
  5. He’s reluctant to make financial commitments. For example, he’ll likely be reluctant to buy a house with you or even book an overseas holiday with you. This might be because he anticipates you finding out about the cheating, or because he plans to eventually end the relationship. If your boyfriend plans on turning his cheating into an actual relationship, he could at least have the decency to tell you to your face.
  6. There’s a sudden change in his schedule. A significant and unexplained change in your partner’s schedule could indicate that he’s being unfaithful. Say he suddenly starts working weekends but he won’t tell you why. It might be because he’s shifting his schedule to see his new love interest. Or, it could be that his schedule hasn’t changed at all—he just told you it did.
  7. He accuses you of cheating. This is one of the most common behaviors in people who are having affairs. Don’t be surprised if your cheating boyfriend starts accusing you of infidelity when he knows full well that he’s the guilty party. This tactic often comes about because he wants you to be on the defensive so you don’t analyze his behavior or accuse him of cheating.
  8. He’s constantly texting or making secret phone calls. Constant texting and phone calls may be a sign that your boyfriend is cheating or even having a full-blown affair. If your partner seems to be angling his phone away from you so you can’t read his messages or is stepping away from you so you can’t hear his phone calls, it could be that he’s keeping something significant from you. It’s common for people who are cheating to avoid leaving their phones lying around in case any incriminating information pops up. He might even bring his phone with him to the bathroom and sleep with his phone under his pillow to avoid being exposed. If your partner seems preoccupied with hiding his phone from you, it may be a cause for concern.
  9. He doesn’t fill you in on his day. Not everyone likes to talk about their day when they get home, but if your boyfriend always used to fill you in on the details and now doesn’t share anything, it could be that he’s cheating and confiding in someone else. Some cheaters avoid spilling any details in case they say something that gets them caught out.
  10. You keep catching him in lies. Does your partner often lie to you about other things besides fidelity? There’s more likely to be cheating in a relationship that’s based on dishonesty, where one person has no problem with lying to the other on a regular basis.
  11. You notice unexplained ATM charges. If you see changes on your bank statements or charges on your credit card that you can’t explain, a cheating boyfriend may be the culprit. People can lie to your face and delete text messages and emails, but financial records are one of the few things that can’t be manipulated.
  12. He’s avoiding you more and more. Sometimes, a cheating boyfriend will try to dodge spending any real amount of time with you. This can come down to many reasons. It could be that he’s no longer in love with you. It might be that he’s planning to end the relationship and needs space to plan it. Or, perhaps he feels so guilty about what he’s doing that he can’t look you in the eye. Whatever the reason, avoidance is a common side effect of cheating.
  13. He becomes unreachable. Unfaithful partners can be difficult to get hold of. They often make themselves unreachable because they don’t want to be disturbed in their cheating. Also, they might deduce that the less reachable they are, the less likely it is that they’ll get caught. If your boyfriend is cheating, he’ll likely start to go AWOL more and more often.
  14. He becomes defensive. If your partner becomes unreasonably defensive over the subject of cheating, it could be a sign that he’s been unfaithful. A defensive reaction is often—though not always—an indication that there’s some truth to the accusation.
  15. Boredom and indifference are a major feature of your relationship. A jealous partner isn’t a good thing, but a little jealousy within a relationship is a mark that there are still feelings there. If your partner seems bored or completely indifferent to you, and couldn’t care less if you flirt with someone else, it may be that someone else has his attention.
  16. You just have a gut feeling. Whether you’ve noticed these signs or not in your relationship, sometimes you’ll just have a gut feeling that your boyfriend is cheating. Though gut feelings can sometimes be the result of anxiety or paranoia, it’s important to listen to them and possibly investigate further rather than just automatically ignoring them. Sometimes, your subconscious mind can see what your eyes can’t.
Vanessa Locampo is an Aussie writer who’s equally obsessed with YA fiction and pasta. Her time is divided between writing all the things, reading all the things, listening to Queen, and bopping her cat on the nose. She has a bachelor’s degree in Creative Writing and has written for sites including and Discovering Montana, and currently works as an editor at Glam. You can keep up with her on Instagram @vanessaellewrites.