My Ex Blocked Me: 18 Smart Things To Do Now That You Can’t Contact Him

Breaking up is never easy, and when your ex decides to block you, it can feel like an additional layer of rejection. However, instead of dwelling on the situation, it’s crucial to focus on constructive steps that can help you move forward. In this article, we’ll explore smart things to do when your ex has blocked you, each aimed at personal growth and healing.

1. Give yourself time and space to process.

When an ex blocks you, it can feel like a slap in the face. Your mind might be swirling with a thousand questions, mixed emotions, and a bit of an ego bruise. Before doing anything impulsive, take a step back and allow yourself the space to just… breathe. Feel the hurt, acknowledge the confusion, and let yourself grieve if you need to.

Every emotion you’re experiencing is valid, and rushing to ‘get over it’ won’t help. By giving yourself the time to genuinely process how you feel, you’re setting up a foundation for clearer thinking and healthier decisions in the days to come.

2. Reflect on the relationship.

Now’s the time for some introspection. While it might sting to think about, try to assess the relationship with a clear head. What worked? What didn’t? Were there warning signs that things were going south? Understanding the dynamics and patterns of the relationship can offer closure.

Moreover, it can provide insights into what you might want (or not want) in a future partnership. It’s all part of growth. While it’s important not to overanalyze and dwell on every little thing, some thoughtful reflection can be enlightening.

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4. Focus on looking after yourself.

Put simply, it’s self-care time. An ex blocking you can be a heavy emotional load to carry, so it’s crucial to make yourself a priority. Dive into activities that uplift you, whether it’s reading a good book, taking a fitness class, indulging in a spa day, or simply catching up on sleep.

Surround yourself with positive influences, like supportive friends or family, and avoid the temptation to continuously rehash the past. Remember, healing is a journey, and by focusing on nourishing your mind, body, and spirit, you’re actively choosing a path of resilience and self-love.

5. Reconnect with your friends and family members.

In the throes of a relationship, especially an intense one, it’s not uncommon to unintentionally drift from some of the core people in our lives. Now, with this unexpected void, it’s the ideal time to bridge that gap. Friends and family can offer a comforting shoulder, an ear to listen, or even a necessary distraction when memories become too much. They know you, perhaps even beyond the relationship version of you, and can help remind you of the person you were and still are.

Spend quality time with them, enjoy shared activities, or even just have those late-night heart-to-hearts. Their support can be a soothing balm during this challenging time.

6. Talk to your therapist about it if you’re really struggling.

Being blocked, especially without closure, can trigger a range of emotions—some of which can be quite challenging to navigate on your own. If you find yourself unable to cope, struggling with self-worth, or just needing someone neutral to talk to, consider seeking professional guidance.

Your therapist or counselor can provide coping strategies, offer a different perspective, and help you process the underlying emotions you’re feeling. Remember, reaching out isn’t a sign of weakness; it’s a proactive step toward ensuring your mental and emotional well-being.

7. Unfollow and mute on social media.

The digital age has made moving on a bit more complicated. Seeing snippets of your ex’s life post-breakup can be a continuous sting, even if you’re not directly communicating. To save yourself additional heartache, consider unfollowing or muting them. This isn’t about being petty; it’s about giving yourself a break from the potential barrage of triggers that could hinder your healing process.

Social media can paint an unrealistically rosy picture of someone’s life, and continuously viewing your ex’s posts can skew your perception and slow down your recovery. Give yourself the gift of digital distance as you work through your feelings.

8. Set new goals for yourself.

When one chapter of our life closes, it provides an opportunity to focus on new beginnings and aspirations. With your ex now in the rearview mirror, it’s time to shift your energy towards what you want to achieve. These goals can be personal, professional, or even simple day-to-day tasks. Perhaps you’ve been toying with the idea of taking up a new hobby, traveling, or pushing for that promotion at work.

By setting clear goals for yourself, you’re not only redirecting your energy towards personal growth, but you’re also reminding yourself of your worth and potential. Plus, the feeling of achievement can be a strong antidote against lingering sadness or self-doubt.

9. Journal your thoughts and feelings.

After a breakup, especially a complicated one where you’ve been blocked, your mind can feel like a whirlwind of emotions. Journaling offers a constructive outlet for all these feelings. Writing down your thoughts can provide clarity, and over time, you might even see patterns or growth in your emotional journey.

Think of it as having a conversation with yourself, and there’s no judgment here. When your thoughts are on paper, they often become less daunting, and you create a bit of mental breathing room. Plus, in the future, looking back at your entries can show you just how far you’ve come.

10. Expand your social circle.

One of the silver linings of a breakup is the opportunity it provides to meet new people and form new connections. Expanding your social circle doesn’t mean immediately jumping into a new romantic relationship. Instead, think of it as broadening your horizons. Join clubs, take classes, attend social meet-ups, or even just say ‘yes’ a bit more often to invitations.

Interacting with a diverse set of individuals can provide fresh perspectives, introduce you to new interests, and even help build your confidence. It’s a reminder that life is brimming with possibilities and new friendships waiting to be formed.

11. Practice gratitude even when everything sucks.

Amid the aftermath of a breakup and the sting of being blocked, it’s easy to spiral into negativity. However, focusing on the positive aspects of your life can be a game-changer. Practicing gratitude is more than just a buzzword; it’s a mindset shift. Start by listing down small things you’re thankful for each day.

It could be a good cup of coffee, a supportive friend, or even just the warmth of sunlight on your skin. This practice can significantly boost your mood and redirect your attention to the positive elements in life. Over time, you’ll notice a shift in your perspective, where you naturally tend to look for the silver lining, even in challenging situations.

12. Learn from the relationship.

Every relationship, regardless of its outcome, comes with lessons. Instead of ruminating on what went wrong or the pain of being blocked, try to objectively analyze the dynamics of your past relationship. Were there red flags you ignored? Communication issues that could’ve been addressed better?

This isn’t about blame but about understanding patterns, acknowledging mistakes, and growing from them. Armed with this newfound knowledge, you’re better prepared for future relationships, ensuring they’re healthier and more in tune with your needs.

13. Focus on self-growth and personal evolution.

With the void left by the breakup, now is the prime time to dive deep into self-improvement. This doesn’t only pertain to the romantic side of things, but all aspects of your life. Maybe you’ve always wanted to learn a new language, pick up a musical instrument, or attend a workshop on emotional intelligence.

Investing time and energy in bettering yourself not only distracts from the current pain but also boosts your self-esteem. As you grow and evolve, you become more self-aware and grounded, making future relationships or personal challenges easier to navigate..

14. Maintain no contact.

You might feel the urge to reach out, ask questions, or seek closure, especially if the act of being blocked was sudden. However, maintaining no contact is crucial. Why? Firstly, it respects your ex’s boundaries—they blocked you for a reason, even if that reason isn’t clear to you. Secondly, it provides both of you the space to heal and reflect.

When emotions are high, reaching out can escalate situations or reopen wounds. Keeping distance allows the dust to settle, granting clarity and perspective. Over time, this also reduces the emotional charge tied to memories or triggers related to the relationship.

15. Embrace emotional healing.

Being blocked can inflict a wound to your pride and evoke feelings of rejection. But it’s essential to understand that healing isn’t linear; some days are better than others. Embrace the process. Allow yourself to feel the pain, anger, or sadness without judgment. But also don’t let those emotions define you.

Consider practices like meditation, deep breathing exercises, or even therapies like Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT) to process these emotions healthily. The goal is to acknowledge your feelings without getting trapped in them, moving forward step by step.

16. Stay open to other connections.

While it might seem tempting to build emotional walls or swear off dating for a while, it’s crucial to remain open to new connections. This doesn’t necessarily mean jumping back into the dating scene immediately. Instead, it’s about not closing yourself off due to past hurts.

Connect with new people, form friendships, and engage in social activities that align with your interests. These interactions remind you that every individual and relationship is unique. By staying open, you increase your chances of forming meaningful connections in the future, whether platonic or romantic.

17. Rediscover your passions.

It’s easy to lose a piece of yourself in a relationship, especially if it was a significant one. Now that it’s over, it’s the perfect time to dive back into those activities, hobbies, or passions you might’ve set aside. Did you love painting, hiking, or playing a musical instrument? Whatever it was, reignite that spark.

Not only does this act as a therapeutic outlet for your emotions, but it reestablishes your identity outside of the relationship. By rediscovering what makes you tick, you’re reinforcing your sense of self-worth and reminding yourself that there’s a vibrant, passionate individual ready to embrace life’s next chapter.

18. Create a vision board.

Post-breakup, the future can seem uncertain, especially if you had future plans with your ex. Creating a vision board can be a transformative way to regain focus on your personal aspirations. Gather magazines, printouts, or personal photos, and start visualizing what you want your future to look like.

This could encompass career goals, travel dreams, personal milestones, or even attributes you’d like to develop. By physically visualizing these aspirations, you’re not just daydreaming—you’re setting an intention and manifesting a path forward without the weight of the past holding you back.

19. Practice self-compassion.

After a breakup, and especially when you’ve been blocked, it’s easy to spiral into self-blame or negative self-talk. But remember, you deserve kindness—especially from yourself. Practicing self-compassion means treating yourself with the same understanding and gentleness you’d offer a friend in a similar situation.

Acknowledge that everyone, including you, makes mistakes and has moments of imperfection. Instead of being overly critical, give yourself the grace to heal, learn, and grow. Incorporate affirmations, journaling, or mindfulness practices to nurture this mindset. Over time, this compassionate approach not only soothes emotional wounds but fosters resilience and a healthier self-image.

Gail is Bolde's social media and partnership manager, as well as an all-around behind-the-scenes renaissance woman. She worked for more than 25 years in her city's local government before making the switch to women's lifestyle and relationship sites, initially at HelloGiggles before making the switch to Bolde.
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