Sex work is a hotly debated topic, and many people still don’t approve of it or consider it a respectable job. I’m not part of that camp, and not only am I not bothered by the fact that my friend is doing it, I’m somewhat jealous. Sure, I feel scared for her safety sometimes, but I also feel excited about her empowerment. Getting paid to have sex with men and calling the shots the entire time doesn’t seem like too bad of a gig sometimes.
- It seems like it could be fun. Sex is great; it’s one of the most fun activities a human can partake in. Being able to do it on a regular basis with all different types of people certainly has its charm. I imagine that you’d also get a ton of validation from other people constantly and I’d definitely relish that. I also wonder what kind of things she wears—I’d have so much fun with the fashion piece.
- I imagine the best-case scenarios. When I’m thinking about how fun it might be, I’m thinking about the best possible instance: being with a kind, attractive, and clean guy. When I think about her sex work, I imagine it only being joyful. I guess I’m forgetting the fact that she probably sleeps with men she’s repulsed by and has other unpleasant experiences with some of her clients.
- She’s shameless about her profession, which is awesome. One of my favorite things about my friend is that she’s unapologetically herself. The same goes for the sex work she does— she never apologizes for it, and why should she? Instead, she speaks about it with her head up. I think it’d be so easy to feel shameful about it, especially with society’s view of this kind of work. I envy her level of confidence and wish I could be like that in my own life.
- I compare our lives sometimes and she often comes out on top. OK, this is an embarrassing one. I wonder how pretty you have to be to do sex work, what your body type has to be, and who decides all of this. As a result, I find myself comparing my looks to hers; sometimes I think I’m as pretty as her, other times I don’t think I’d stack up and it sucks. I know it’s a silly and futile exercise but I still do it.
- It’s kind of badass. I’m all about female empowerment. There’s a movement to bring more respect to sex workers, identifying it as a legitimate line of work, and I think it’s badass that she’s taking part in this. She’s owning autonomy over her own body and working it. I look up to her for what she’s doing even though I know that most people look down on her.
- That being said, I have mixed feelings about sex work in general. I think it’s important to empower women to do whatever they want to do, including this line of work. Nonetheless, I don’t think it’d ever be for me no matter how much I idealize the experience. Some people just aren’t cut out for it and I’m one of them.
- It’s important to break the stigma. My friend does this by unabashedly talking about her experiences. I’ve seen her speak up about it in front of strangers. The stigma against women who do sex work is so huge and it’s sad. For example, the words “prostitute” and “hooker” are often used to describe women like my friend. These terms are totally dehumanizing and pull the respect right out from under them. It’s crucial to use appropriate language in order to start breaking down that stigma.
- Most people’s only exposure to sex work is from pop culture. The majority of people have only heard about sex work from watching movies or TV where these women are portrayed in a disrespectful way. They don’t know the experiences of the actual women doing it or what it truly looks like in real life. While I’m jealous of my friend, I don’t envy the stereotypes she gets stuck with from all kinds of people.
- I’d never be able to do it gracefully. I absolutely suck at casual sex. I don’t do well with it because I get attached to people really easily. I’d get all upset and I’d overthink the crap out of every situation. I probably wouldn’t be much of a joy because I’d likely cry periodically and that’s not really what people sign up for.
- Admittedly, I’m also a little worried about her. As much as I think it’s empowering, I also think sex work can be dangerous. She’s meeting strange men alone, usually at their places. I’m not taking a jab at the morality of the work, it’s just that a lot can go wrong in those situations if you get a bad egg. I’d probably be too scared to follow through with it because of all the things that could go south. Hopefully, she’s able to stay safe.
