My New Year’s Resolution Is To Quit Online Dating

My New Year’s Resolution Is To Quit Online Dating

I’ve been on and off online dating sites for years. I’ve been on plenty of dates, good and bad, and I even had a two year relationship with one guy I met online. Despite the overwhelming number of losers there are to wade through, there are definitely some awesome guys to meet online. That being said, I’m over it. I want to meet the next guy I go on a date with the old fashioned way. Or just any way that doesn’t involve scrolling through endless personality-less faces. That’s why my resolution this year is to delete the last online dating app on my phone and start paying attention to the people right in front of me.

  1. I ignore a lot of people. Even if I do respond to a guy’s message, it doesn’t take much for me to change my mind and stop responding. I probably don’t give most guys the real chance they deserve, because online dating makes it too easy to just ignore instead of just saying I’m not interested.
  2. I’ve stopped bothering to message guys first. I’m a huge advocate of women making the first move whenever the opportunity presents itself. But I’ve found that even when I take the time to write a decent message, I get ignored 95% of the time. I guess now I understand what it’s like to be a guy on a dating app.
  3. I realized Tinder wasn’t for me a long time ago. I deleted Tinder within a few weeks, the OKCupid app is just the natural next one to go.
  4. I feel like I keep seeing the same people. I’ve had the same profile on OKCupid for almost a year now, and there are so many faces that have been on there just as long, if not longer, than me. I have to wonder why they haven’t found someone yet, but then I realize they’re probably thinking the same thing about me.
  5. Most profiles are pretty much the same. I swear everyone says they love to travel, music is a big part of their lives, and their family and friends and important to them. All those things are great, really. But I want to know what makes people unique, and that stuff just doesn’t seem to come across online. Someone I meet in person has a way better chance of catching my interest than yet another guy online who talks about loving sports and sitting on a patio in the summer.
  6. I’m finally OK with being single. I was using online dating as a bit of a distraction after going through a bad breakup. I didn’t necessarily want a relationship, but I didn’t want to be dateless every weekend either. Now, staying home on a Saturday night is a lot more appealing than going on another lukewarm date with someone I’m not interested in.
  7. Most conversations lead nowhere anyway. I can’t even count the number of conversations I’ve had that seem promising but just end up fizzling out. Of course, that’s to be expected when you’re dating, but I just can’t be bothered anymore. I’m all small talked out.
  8. The gross messages aren’t as funny as they used to be. I used to love taking screenshots of weird messages I’d get from guys and sending them to all my friends. We’d all have a good laugh and agree that guys are disgusting. But the novelty has kind of worn off now and those messages are just a nuisance.
  9. The meeting up with strangers thing isn’t that appealing. First dates are nerve-wracking no matter what, but showing up somewhere when there’s a chance the person you’re meeting could look nothing like their pictures, among other first date disasters, just makes it even worse.
  10. I want to believe I’m still capable of meeting someone in person. If I don’t have my online dating profile to fall back on I might actually try harder to strike up a conversation with someone in person. At the very least, when I’m in public, I’ll be a lot more approachable if my face isn’t buried in my iPhone.
By day, Courtney is a digital marketing copywriter living in Toronto, Canada. By night, she's a freelance lifestyle writer who, in addition to Bolde.com, contributes regularly to AmongMen.ca, Complex.ca and SheBlogs Canada. Want to chat about relationships, Stephen King or your favorite true crime podcast/documentary/book? She's on Twitter @courtooo