You’re Beautiful: 10 Simple Ways to Love Yourself More

Every day there’s another story about a woman starving herself or exercising to the point of complete exhaustion just to be beautiful. That’s not beauty. If everyone looked the same, the world would be a boring place to live. It’s your differences that make you beautiful. It’s not about weight, curves, height, blemishes, or any of that. It’s time women get over what the media defines as beauty standards. It’s time you see how love you for you, not for the size on your jeans.

  1. Ask a friend or relative. Don’t do this with just anyone. Talk to people you truly trust and that you know have your back. Ask them to honestly tell you what they find beautiful about you. Put your ego in check here. You might hope they mention certain features, but if they don’t, it’s okay. You look at yourself everyday and don’t realize what’s beautiful about you. Your friends and family do. Sit down with as many people as you can and have a positive beauty conversation.
  2. Focus on what you do like. We all have things we hate about ourselves. Don’t even get me started on my thighs. The point of this exercise is to stop looking at what you think your flaws are. I don’t care if it means spending an hour in front of a mirror. Find something you do like. Maybe it’s your eyes or your arms. Maybe you like your feet. Find as many things as you can that you find beautiful about yourself. The more you focus on these areas, the less you see your flaws.
  3. Think about how you make others feel. When your friends are around you, do you make them laugh? Do you make your boyfriend feel better after a bad day? Your personality makes you beautiful. I know it sounds like a tired cliche, but it’s true. A 10 with a bad attitude can’t keep a guy, but a 6 with a great personality lives happily ever after with her prince charming. Simply making others feel better with your presence is a special kind of beauty. Trust me, the people who matter don’t give a damn about a little extra jiggle if you have a good attitude.
  4. Embrace what makes you different. Cindy Crawford could have given in and gotten her mole removed, but she kept it .Why? It was something that made her different and she embraced as part of her physical beauty. Follow her lead. Have a bad scar from acne? Have pale skin during the summer? Can’t fit into a size 12? Who cares! It’s your body and your life. You’re always going to look different than everyone else. Embrace what’s different and think of it as your own unique version of beauty.
  5. Let go of what you think beauty is. I’m sure most of us would love to have a Victoria’s Secret model’s body. They’re slim, fit and curvaceous. Try and find a woman who looks like that in your daily life – it’s nearly impossible. I guarantee you still think a lot of women around you are beautiful,  though. We know beauty isn’t just one type of look. Everyone thinks of beauty in a different way. When you let go of the supposed norm, it’s far easier to see how beautiful you are. Beauty is what you like. It doesn’t matter what anyone else says.
  6. Treat others well. This goes back to personality. If you act like an ass, you’ll look like an ass. Act like an angel and you’ll look like one. The way you treat others, not just friends and family, changes how you appear to them. Your appearance is reflected in their eyes and their gratitude. Help someone pick up their items when their shopping bag breaks. Volunteer once in a while. You’ll find yourself feeling more beautiful and confident the more you do it.
  7. Focus on a single feature at a time. Look in the mirror and all you see is what’s wrong. The good gets overshadowed by the bad. Look at your body one feature at a time. There’s a whole lot more good there than you ever imagined. Think having a huge nose ruins your face? Focus on your eyes, lips, cheek bones, hair and neck. They’re beautiful. Suddenly, your nose seems beautiful too. Looking at one feature and finding beauty in that feature helps change your entire perspective.
  8. Look on the inside. Okay, back to cliches. Inner beauty really is important. Think about your accomplishments, hobbies and things you do for others. You might think you look horrible when you get dressed up, but when you’re playing basketball, you feel strong, confident and beautiful. Beauty isn’t just about what you look like on the outside. It’s also about how you feel on the inside. Let your inner beauty be all you see. Others will see it too. Those who can’t see it don’t matter.
  9. Laugh with friends. When you’re laughing with friends, you’re not focused on how you look. You’re just having a good time. Watch your friends. They’re not judging you for your flaws either. You’re just someone they love having in their lives. Spend a day laughing with your friends and you’ll instantly feel beautiful. The laughter boosts your mood and helps you better see all the things that truly are beautiful about you. Plus, when you’re laughing, you look physically better too.
  10. Smile at yourself. A simple smile is one of the most attractive features on a woman. Think about it. You see identical twins. Once looks bored, but the other is smiling. Which one is more attractive? Everyone is more attracted to a person who smiles. Having a hard time seeing how beautiful you are? Look in the mirror and smile at yourself. It changes your entire face. Leave the sour puss behind and smile more. You’ll look and feel more beautiful.

Beauty is what you make of it. We’ll never be perfect, so why try? You’re beautiful the way you are. Now go find out for yourself.

Crystal Crowder is a freelance writer and blogger. She's a tech geek at heart, but loves telling it like it is when it comes to love, beauty and style. She's enjoys writing music, poetry and fiction and curling up with a great book. You can find her on Twitter @ccrowderwrites or check out her other writing on Medium.