Is there anything more awkward than small talk? Whether you’re at the mall, a house party, or the office, having to smile and bear small talk with someone feels like such a waste of your time. It’s so much better to make real connections with others. So, if you’re someone who enjoys having deep conversations that teach you something new or genuinely entertain you, you won’t find yourself saying these 10 things.
1. “The Weather’s So Hot Today!”
Resorting to what the weather’s like is a classic example of small talk. It kills awkward silence and is something that everyone experiences, so it’s common ground. Complaining about how hot or cold it is outside means you don’t have to try hard to get a conversation going. But it’s going to be a boring conversation.
2. “I Never Read.”
Is it just me or is it so annoying when people say that they never read books? Not only does this shut down someone’s attempt at an interesting conversation, like if they’re talking about an amazing memoir they recently read, but it’s almost like people assume it’s funny to mention that they haven’t read a book since kindergarten. Um, what? All you want to say is, “No wonder we’re stuck in this boring small talk now!” Right?
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4. “The Traffic Was A Nightmare!”
If you’re explaining to the host of a party that you’re late because of the hideous traffic, by all means talk about the accident on the highway. But if you’re standing around talking about the traffic because you have nothing better to say, you’re clutching onto straws and won’t leave the conversation with much of a connection.
5. “Did You See The News About…?”
Talking about newsworthy topics can make you seem more intelligent, but this is usually also basic small talk. You’re not connecting with another person about their lives or having a meaningful conversation with them. You’re too busy talking about the earthquake or climate change news that you saw in the headlines. This is stuff you can get on your phone later. You don’t have to discuss it at a party.
6. “Have You Tried The Meatballs?”
If you’re at a party at someone’s house and you don’t know what to say, you might tell the person next to you how delicious the meatballs are that you’re eating. Great. This is just like having to sit through a podcast where the host is chewing away on delicious food. So boring. Only speak about the food to the caterer or chef, ’cause then maybe they’ll have something more interesting to share with you.
7. “I Love Your Shirt!”
If you spot a cute guy at a party who’s wearing a cool shirt and you can’t help but tell him, go ahead. Maybe he’ll see it as a flirtatious ice breaker. But generally, it’s best to avoid talking about what you love about other people’s appearances. It comes across as fake because it’s done to death. They might wonder if you really think their shirt is so cool or you’re just desperate for small talk so you don’t stand around on your own.
8. “Look At This Meme.”
People’s social media timelines are flooded with memes every day, so they probably don’t need to see that dancing cat meme for the hundredth time this week. Showing them a meme or video on your phone is annoying. Now they have to sit there and pretend to find it funny. Plus, you’re not even talking. You’re just staring at a screen. Ugh.
9. “You Look Younger.”
Although you might think it’s complimentary to tell someone who’s mentioned their age that they look younger, it’s not always well received. Talking about age with people you don’t know can be tricky, so it’s best avoided. They might think you’re just trying to be nice, which can make them self-conscious and want to run in the direction of those meatballs you were singing about.
10. “I’m So Tired.”
If you want to connect with people on a deeper level, you’re going to show interest in what they have to say. You’re not going to go on about your own stuff, like how tired you are. Isn’t this the most boring way to start a conversation or try to keep it alive? What are people supposed to say? It sounds like it’s a pity party for one over here, and no one wants to be invited.
11. “Did You Hear About [Insert Celebrity Name]?”
Maybe you’re obsessed with all things celebrity and you read the latest juice about your favorite famous people on the way to the event, but you can’t expect other people to want to talk about celebs or be as interested in them. Instead of being a way to move a conversation along, tabloid talk could stop it dead in its tracks because it’s usually negative and filled with gossip.
